Invisble
by xIndieNikkix
Summary: She was the classic nerdy outcast that was always looked passed especially by The one she always wanted to notice her. But what happens when she moves to LA and runs in to her former 4 guy friends 3 years later? And whos chasing who now? James/OC
1. Chapter 1

Remember me- Chapter 1

Year: 2003

Age:10

" _Im going to be famous one day!" James said excitedly standing up tall holding his hands out. Nikki laughed and rolled her eyes._

" _Right and im going to marry a backstreet boy" James glared at her._

" _It could happen! Besides no one can resist this face!" He said winking._

" _I can!" Said carlos taking him down from behind. He screamed and they wrestled to the ground. Nikki once more rolled her eyes and laid her head back on the bark of a pine tree that stood in there school was beside her reading and kendall was attempting to hit a hockey puck._

_Suddenly the whistle blew from afar and all four boys moaned. Carlos and james released each other and made to walk back. Carlos, Logan and kendall ran ahead leaving Nikki and James behind. _

" _Just promise, if you do happen to become famous you'll remember me?" Nikki said softly. James shot her a famous smile and she relaxed._

" _How could I forget you?Your my best friend." He said hugging her._

Year: 2008

Age:15

" _THINK FAST!" Scream kendall across the Hall as he pulled back on his swing. James And Carlos stood at the other end padded up. Logans arms were crossed while he explained what a bad idea it was to kendall who was more then happy to ignore his logic._

" _BRING IT!" James walked passed them and snorted. All four of them starred at her as she glanced up from her book. _

" _If I were you id watch your aim, its going to go right through the glass case behind carlos and james." Logan nodded at her comment and said ' You see even she knows'. It had been 5 years since that day on the playground and lets face it as soon as there balls dropped they forgot about being friends with girls. Especially Nikki. She wasn't exactly the prettiest or sexiest of the girls in school. Actually she was like the girl you avoided. She was different and she was unique. Black hair, big glasses, not exactly a size zero. An underdog if you will. But every once in awhile she'd see the boys in the hall and wave, and most of those times james was the one to ignore her. Something happened to him one day where he just felt the need to cut ties with her. It hurt but she didn't care. She was a loner and could handle it. But she was always logical and there to back up most of logans bull and this was one of those times. As much as she wanted to see james ass in trouble for once, she still loved the other three._

" _Oh please Nicole," James said coldy. She shuttered at the use of her full name. " Nobody likes a whiney Bitch." He finished holding out his glove. She shot daggers at him._

"_Fine, I hope you fucking eat the damn thing." She said slamming her locker shut walking in the opposite direction. Suddenly She heard a slap shot and a wicked shatter. Karmas a bitch mr. Diamond,she thought wickedly._

Year: 2009

Age:16

" _Hey nikki," Said Miranda from the lunch line. She was on Starring down her iphone texting or tweeting someone. " Did you hear? Kendall Knight, Logan Mitchell, Carlos Garcia and James Diamond got picked up by some producer last night and apprently there going to become famous or some crap." She finished as Nikki sighed and dropped her fries. She stood up._

" _I think I just lost my appetite." She said tossing her lunch out and walking away from a very confused Miranda. She headed down the hall and into the aux dance room. She looked around making sure she was tottally alone and popped in her ipod. Sometimes this was the only way to escape the crap world that she currently lived in. She threw herself around in circles and jumped in the air to the sounds of Harder to Breathe by Maroon 5. By the end of the song, she was out of breath and kneeling in front of the panel of mirrors. She watched herself loose composure and falter. Slammed her fist on the ground._

_It wasn't didn't even say goodbye. They lied. He lied. But why do I care so much about an ass who was always a total dick to me till we were 13?She thought. Someone clapped from behind her. Her eyes landed on a shortish boy with black hair and cheeky dimples leaning against the door frame. She quickly wiped her eyes and sniffled with a smile._

" _Logan, sorry I didn't see you there-" She said simply smiled. " How'd you find me?" She said refusing to make eye contact._

" _Miranda," He got up and walked over to the amp sitting down on it. " She said that once you heard we left you got pissed and ran this is always go when your upset." _

" _Yeah I was just fustrated. You know." He nodded in understanding._

" _You know I know he won't admit it, but I know he's going to miss you and teasing you everyday." I snorted and he laughed. " IM serious, and Kendalls going to miss his relationship expert, carlos is going to miss your kick ass girl slap shot and I know im going to miss my study budy. Come on you know you can visit anytime-"_

" _Logan, you don't get it do you? I don't want to be here. Period. I want to go to LA. I want to lay on a beach. I hate it here." She said slumping down against the mirror._

" _Then change it." He said starring her down._

" _Oh please, like I can just change it-" He shrugged at her._

_" Stop complaining for once. Just take control of your life. You don't like it Nikki, change it." He said softly walking toward the door. He turned on his heel and walked back. He sank to his knees and starred into her eyes. " If I happen to never see you again, or for a long long time, there is something i've wanted to do for awhile." He leaned in and kissed her passionatly making her pull him down. He let go and leaned his forehead against hers for a momen then starred into her eyes. " Now you can brag your first kiss was with a famous pop star." She laughed and slapped him._

" _Get out of here. Go be famous. Asshole." He smirked and walked toward the door._

" _Remember nikki, Your the smartest girl I know, you have the power to change whatever you don't like in your life." With that she heard the door click shut and sighed. Damn him for being right she thought sourly._


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

_Present Day_

" Im going to say It because you all are chicken shits, but damn do I love Summer Heat." James said peeking over the rim of his raybands,Starring at the passing girls in skimpy bikini bottoms. Logan, Carlos and Kendall followed in his action and agreed with an mhmmm.

" New girls. Can't get much better then that." Logan said stretching his arms over his head.

" Hell yeah." Kendall said sipping on his lemonade.

Xxx

Nikki stretched her bare legs out of the cab, letting her black 6 inch wedge booties touch LA soil for the first time. She hopped out and smiled taking in the fresh sun. Her raven black curls fell flawlesly down her porcline skined back. She handed the cab driver a 20 and stood tall under the palmwoods sign. She took a deep breath and headed through the opened double doors.

With each stride, someones mouth dropped but due to spending her last 2 years in NYC, her city swag was turned on ignoring everyone except for her destination. 2d. She strode down the isle making 5 guys gasp and 3 boys eyes widen and 4 cat calls. She walked up to the front desk and stopped flipping her hair over her shoulder.

" Savini, Nicolette" The large Manager turned from his magazine and his jaw dropped as well. He wordlessly handed her, her key card making her smile softly.

" Dude Please, girl number 4 had the best pair of-" But Kendall stopped midsentance, his eyes fell on her. Logan, james and carlos followed his gaze and like everyone else there mouths opened. Nikki paused noticing them. It was her turn to let her jaw drop.

" Logan?" She said giggling. She ran over and hugged him. He stood stone still, possibly still in shock she even knew who he was. " its Nikki, from middle school." He shook his head and his eyes traveled up and down her. " Remeber? Come on logeek you don't remember your first kiss?" His eyes suddenly widened and he turned pale.

" Oh my god. Nicolette Savini? You look … uhm. You look-" She laughed at his stutter and shrugged.

" Yeah , I grew into my body I guess." She smiled. He laughed nervously.

" damn right." He whispered softly. She scrunched her face in confusion. " I-I mean uhm. What uh. What are you-"

" Doing here? Oh um I got job in a dance company." She said softly twisting her hair nervously.

" Your still dancing? Thats great!" He said finally coming back into reality.

" Yeah , after you guys left I -" Suddenly someone called her name and she glanced at the moving van.

" Ms. Savini where should we take this stuff?" He asked. She smiled.

" 2d." She said and they nodded.

" Your moving into 2d?" Logan stated smirking.

" yeah, well... I needed room for my crap." She said looking away.

" Thats like a full blow penthouse."

" so? Go big or go home right?" She said shrugging. " You wanna maybe get some dinner later?" He nodded and smiled letting his famous dimples appear and she bit her lip and waved by to them.

" This way boys! And be careful please." She said with an airy tone.

Carlos , james and kendall all came back into reality once she entered the elevator. There eyes went to logan who immediately blushed.

" What?" He said walking toward the opposite elevator.

" what do you mean what? Hot girl walks in and runs right to you and walks right passed all this ? WHY?" James shrieked gesturing to all of his body. Logan snorted.

" AND HOW DO YOU KNOW HER?" Kendall exclaimed making logan shrink back.

" You know her too, unless you weren't paying attention. Thats nikki savini. Remember? She was our friend when we were 10 and was in like every one of our classes through Middle school before we left?" The boys faces scrunched in consentration in trying to figure out who they knew that looked like that from back then. The boys entered there appartment and carlos, kendall and james fell to the couch as logan walked in and out his room with a book.

" Aw our old middle school yearbook!" Kendall said grabbing it. Logan cleared his throat and pulled it back. He flipped through a couple of pages and passed it to them pointing to the small pudgy girl with large rimmed glasses braceses and nappy hair. There jaws dropped for a second time.

" Oh my god." James said grabbing the book and standing up. " Nikki." He whispered and flipped through some more pages, reading about her in art club and danceline. His features softened as he eyed all her accomplishments and awards. He sighed when he reached the last page with the photo collages and he spotted the picture they took on the play ground when they were 10. His arms were tightly wrapped around her and she was smirking at him with her nose scrunched up.

" James...James...JAMESSSS!" Screamed Kendall and all three boys eyed him,

" Dude, No. Nonononononononono. NO. come on you always get the girl. Thats not fair." Carlos said pissely. James sighed.

" I don't want her." He said finally and the three boys let out a sigh of relief. " I need her." There eyes shot to him. But he was starring into the distance. He walked into his room and shut the door. Kendall, logan and carlos starred after him.

" Shit now what do we do?" Carlos said sadly. Kendall shrugged and turned to logan.

" Ask logie hes the one whos got a date with her tonight." Kendall said tossing the book on the coffee table.

" Whos got a date tonight?" Asked a soft voice from the doorway. Logan turned quickly to see a curious looking camille with her arms crossed.

" Its not a date. IM catching up with an old friend." He said hurridly holding his hands up. She shook her head.

" Its a date. Her voice even said it." Kendall said mockingly. Logan smirked and crossed his arms.

" Please kendall, you know a guy and a girl can be friends. I mean take me and camille for an example." He said gesturing to camille who walked next to him. Her hand somehow found his ass and she gave it a squeeze. He gasped and starred at her and she giggled with a wink.

Xxxx

Nikki pulled on a pair of black skinny jeans and her favorite pair of combat boots she baught at the military store when she first moved to NYC. Those boots had been with her everywhere and been through everything with her. She sighed and walked over to her mirror fixing her long black half moon curls. With a sigh, she grabbed her leather brown bag and aviators and walked into the elevator.

She arrived and stepped out of the elvator looking around for the familiar tuft of black hair and pair of dimples. Suddenly someone stepped in her passage way and she gasped.

"Oh my god." She said grabbing her chest and taking a step back.

" hey nikki!" James exclaimed waving. She scrunched her face in confusion crossed her arms. "its me james." She stayed silent. He nervously bit his lip. " From middle school?" She didn't falter.

" Nikki!" Someone said from behind james. She smiled to logan and waved in his direction. he waved back starring at james in question. She walked passed james and toward logan. James turned on his heel and watched her leave.

" WAIT! NIKKI!" She turned.

" What?" she asked venomously.

" I have a question." she crossed her arms and locked her leg. " Why logan?" She snorted and glanced back to logan who was standing by the exit. She walked back up to james.

" Remember that day on the playground. We were 10." she said softly starring into his eyes. Hoping he would remember.

" No." He said confused as ever. She sighed.

" Thats exactly why I picked logan." She turned on her heel and walked back to logan smiling.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Nikki sat in the dance studio stretching. Her company had gone for the night and her instructer said she was able to stay later if she wanted but someone had booked it for tonight. She smiled and agreed that when they came she'd gladly leave. She was finally alone and ready to practice.

" How do you do that?" Asked a voice from the door behind her. She gasped and turned seeing logan in sweats smirking arms crossed with a smug look. She smirked.

" Wouldn't you like to know." She said slyly. He laughed. " Hang on what are you doing here?" He shrugged and motioned behind him. Suddenly someones voice boomed from behind him shaking the glass mirrors.

" DOG FALL IN NOW!" A large man screamed once more. Logan not even wincing rolled his eyes.

" What the fuck was that?" She asked curious as hell. Logan laughed and suddenly was pushed aside roughly revealing a smirking kendall and carlos.

" you should do that stretch you did before you know the one where you pull your leg up the back of your head and-" Kendall started.

" Or you can help me stretch." Said james with a devilish grin. Nikki rolled her eyes and grabbed her stuff.

" DOGS! NOW!" The man shouted once more.

" Thats my que to leave." She said laughing slightly. There faces paled.

" NO!" they echoed in unison. She stopped dead in her tracks.

" What do you mean no?" They shook there heads at her.

" Kelly won't be here for like 2 hours and thats just enough time for him to kill us and burry the bodies in the basement." james said fearfully.

" OH please hes your boss, he can't be that bad." She said crossing her arms.

" Princess, I have the place booked for the night so you might want to !" Gustavo as the boys called him, said with displeased tone. Nikki dropped her bag on the ground and walked right up to his face making him shrink back a bit.

" Who do you think your calling princess." She said as logan pulled her away but she fought back.

" We have real work to do, these dogs need to be trained for there performance this saturday. And in case you haven't seen, THEY CAN'T DANCE." Nikki snorted at his comment.

" Yeah see Ill agree with you on that, Fat Boy Slim." She said turning on her heel and picking up her bag. The boys immediately saw gustavo turn red and held him back. She turned again. " Just remember to point your toes boys, Otherwise let the cramping begin." She said softly walking to the door. The boys faces paled once more making expressions saying ' WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING I THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO STAY!'.

" WAIT!" Gustavo yelled behind her sounding slightly defeated. " Have you ever taught a dance class before?" He said crossing his arms. She smirked.

" How do you think I can afford LA?" She dropped her stuff once more and motioned to the dance room. The boys looked at each other knowing they might have made a huge mistake. Nikki poked her head out of the room. " Uhm, get the hell in here and stretch. NOW!" She screamed. They jumped and cautiously walked in.

xxx

" GIVE ME 50 PUSH UPS NOW!" she screamed loudly into kendalls ear. He moaned and fell to the ground. " Get up you pathetic excuse of a boy band member."

" No." He said into the hardwood floor. " IM good down here." Nikkis eyes traveled to logan who was on his back almost in tears carlos who was in fetal position and james who was still doing the routine almost half perfectly with over enthusiastic feelings. She rolled her eyes.

" Seriously nick, im in more then enough pain." Said logan moaning. She sighed.

" Your shitting me right? That was a warmup." She said smoothly. All three boys gasped and starred at her. Gustavo sat smiling in the cornor nibbling on donuts with freight train and kelly was holding back laughter. Nikki eyed them. " What exactly did you do to them to make them so lazy?" Gustavo coughed on his strawberry donut. She walked over and pulled it from his mouth. " could it be they get there lazy habits from you? They used to be in amazing shape. They were hockey players. Now they can't even do ballet warm ups I do with the 5 year olds on saturday." She groaned and threw the donut out as gustavo whined.

" You four on your feet now. Im going to be your worst nightmare. Expect hell. Because im going to give it." there eyes widened at her.

" Sorry, but we're pop artists not ballarinas." She snorted at kendalls comment.

" if you can do ballet you can do any dance move. Its a known fact, ballet is the core to all balance. Or do you guys all wanna fall off stage into each and into a thousand screaming girls?" They all looked at each other and back to nikki.

" screaming girls." they announced in unison.

" Fine. Enjoy rape. And death." She said heading to the exit. They gasped and stopped her.

" We were just kidding." Carlos said luaghingly.

" We can...learn ballet?" Said logan hesitantly.

" Sure how hard can it be?" James said with a hopeful smile.

xxx

" OH MY GOD IT BURNS!" Screamed Carlos.

" LOGAN STOP SMACKING MY ARM!" yelled james

" ARE YOU KIDDING ME RIGHT NOW I CAN'T FEEL MY THIGHS!" Kendall said falling to the floor.

Nikki Shook her head.

" Oh my god guys, where are your balls at? Did you drop them outside or something?" She barked sassly.

" NO I THINK THERE BACK IN MY STOMACH!" james said painfully falling to the floor.

" I agree." Said carlos falling ontop of him. Logan was the last to collapse and nikki sighed.

" fine we'll continue tomorrow night." She said walking to her stuff.

" Don't you have rehersal all day?" logan said softly. The boys all starred at her hopefully.

" Yeah but I don't care. I usually stay after anyway." She said throwing her bag on her shoulder.

" how the hell do you dance for more then 16 hours?" kendall stated in shock. She glanced up from her phone.

" Easy I just do. I mean if I don't dance, what else is there for me to do besides eat and sleep?" She said rolling her eyes.

" Shit , your insane." Said james from the pile.

" No , some of us have to work harder then others to stay in LA. No offense im sure you all work your asses off, but if im not touring on company then im working at a studio all day to pay rent and shit. My company doesn't pay my bills. I do." She said put her hand on her hip.

" WE PAY FOR SOME STUFF!" screamed james in defense.

" Name one thing." She challenged. He thought for a few moments then snapped his finger.

" Our phone bill-"

" NOPE! I pay that. Which id like to adress stop making calls to LONDON JAMES!" Gustavo threatened.

" OUR FOOD!"

" Nope we pay that too. Stop maxing out your Black card ON CORNDOG IMPORTS CARLOS!" gustavo repremended.

" uhm, Our..." But james was at a loss for words.

" see," She sighed. " Like I said. Some of us aren't as lucky."

" What about your mom and dad?" Logan suggested. Nikki snorted.

" Divorced 2 years ago and cant stand the fact that im doing such terrible things with my life." She walked towards the door.

" Sorry. I didn't-"

" Please. It doesn't matter to me why should it matter to you?" She laughed and walked out. All four boys became solomn while gustavo grabbed another donut from frieght train.

" Maybe we should attempt the routine again." Kendall suggested. They glared at him.

" or we can go home ice our legs and find our balls."

" agreed." They all said in unison.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

There was a knock at the door and all 4 boys moaned and screamed for katie. They sat with bags of ice on there legs elevating them on the table. The pain they were expiriencing was more the brutal then any hockey game, or beat down they've ever had.

" KATIE!" They all screamed again as the bell rang once more. Katie reluctantly walked out of her room with a scowl and opened the door to reveal nikki standing there. The boys gasped and backed away.

"Hey guys , sorry to barge in I just uhm wanted to apologize about all that crap I said at the studio yesterday." She looked down embarrased.

" Its fine we didn't care. Honest. Right guys?" said logan as they all nodded. " so whats in the container." he eyed it cautiously. She smiled.

" Cookies. I made them so you can feel better. Chocolate releases endorphins to make you love and be happy. Its amazing actually." She said softly walking over to them. She put them down and all four voultures feasted as she backed away and sat next to james.

" so I have a question." carlos said with a mouth full of chocolate chip heaven.

" Ask away." She said smiling.

" What exactly happened to you? You used to be really...weird." Logan and kendall smacked him upside the head making him look at them in question. She laughed.

" Uhm, I think it took you guys leaving, me loosing my friends and realizing it was time to take control of my life."

" But how did you become a dancer?" Kendall said.

"I was always a dancer. Guess you just forgot. Logan always came to my performances so he remembers." They all turned away except for logan. " Then about 2 months after you guys left I audtioned for NYAA, got in then graduated and got offered a job on my dance company."

" What's a dance company?" Asked james with a full mouth.

" When you tour with dancers, and perfom and sometimes we get hired as a group for broadway or something." She said picking up a cookie and taking a bite.

" Cause you got like, really hott." Carlos said laughing. Kendall and logan smacked him upside the head and he coughed out cookies.

" Thank you? I think?" She laughed a little and she felt james eyes on her. Her cheeks tinted pink. His hand made its away around her waist and he gently squeezed it. She jumped at his touch and got up. All four boys starred at her. " Sorry I just remembered I have to uhm, get something at the studio. See you guys later." She quickly exited and leaned against the wall outside the door. A tear escaped her eye. 'Asshole.' She thought as she walked back to her room.

James stood up and followed her. Logan carlos and kendall watched with full mouths as he slammed the door. He limped down the hall, determined as ever to catch her. He walked up the wood stained door and knocked 3 times. Suddenly it opened to reveal the tear stained face of Nikki. James leaned down and grabbed her face pulling her forward. He pressed his lips so hard on hers she stumbled back a few steps. At first she resisted , then pushed back and released after 30 seconds. She starred at him. Her hand collided with his cheek and he stood there in shock.

" Asshole." She said venomously.

" Why him? WHY HIM?" james questioned sighed and backed up.

" You don't fucking get it do you?" She whispered harshly. He looked at her questioningly. " You forgot about me. You left me hanging. You walked away from me, not the other way around." He looked down.

"Im sorry." He said quietly.

" Oh please save the bs james. You don't even remember the last thing you said to me before everything changed so don't-"

" I promised you I wouldn't forget you when I was famous. And I know I broke it. But im asking for a second chance-"

" What so you can screw up a second time?"

" No so I can fucking make it right." He yelled slamming his hand on the door frame. She paused and starred at him.

" You broke my heart." She said softly making him weak in the knees . His eyes dimmed. " I watched you hook up with almost every girl in school, and I was looked passed. Do you know what thats like?"

" right now? Im starting to." she looked away and sighed.

" Goodbye james." She pushed him out the door and shook her head. " Im so done with this crap I have more important things to do-"

" Oh really like logan?" She gasped and punched him in his chest. He took a few steps back rubbing it.

" Logan has nothing to do with any of this. He was the only friend I had beside miranda. How dare you. Why don't you go fuck the malibu barbies downstairs. Unless you already have and im the last to go." She said viciously. He snorted.

" OH please, don't be such a holy saint. Your just jelouse." She smirked.

" JELOUSE? OF WHAT THE GIRLS YOU FUCK OVER DAILY? DON'T FLATTER YOURSELF!" She screamed. Suddenly logan , carlos and kendall emerged from there door into the hall watching intently for flying objects or fists.

" SAYS THE GIRL WHO WAS SO MADLY IN LOVE WITH ME IN MIDDLE SCHOOL, THAT SHE'D FOLLOW ME AROUND!" He yelled back in her face.

" YEAH AND I GUESS I GREW OUT OF MY STUPIDITY ,BUT YOU JAMES DIAMOND ARE THE SAME SELF CONCIETED PRETTY FACED FUCK YOU WERE 3 YEARS AGO. YOUR A FUCKING JOKE!" James snorted and turned on his heel. " GO TO HELL!"

The boys renenterd there appartment and starred wide eyed as james came in slamming the door.

" Not a fucking word." He said flipping on the tv. They all held up there hands in defeat and ran in different directions.


	5. Chapter 5

Nikki was fuming. What a fucking asshole. How dare he dictate 'her' life to her. Fucking jerk. With that disgustingly beautiful face and those horribly stunning eyes. And that hair, always so perfect and percise like the fucking world depended on it. Even bruised and angry he was beautiful. Ugh. She was paced her room, then paced the kitchen. Slammed some doors and hit some tables. Fuck it she thought. There was no getting over him. She tried it for years. And this, was not going to end. Ever.

Xxx

Stupid bitch, james thought seethingly. He angrily flipped through channels on tv and his friends sat on the opposite side of the couch starring him down fearfully. They had never seen james so angry before.

Of all the things, She had to move back. And She had to look all amazing and shit. How dare she fucking tease him. How dare she stand there and assume hes been with every girl in the palm woods. It wasn't the slightest bit true . He clenched hist fist and tossed the remote to his side getting up and pacing the floor. What was her plan? Make him beg? She can't just walk around here in his home looking like that. With those beautifully sickening curves. And that terribly alluring smile. And those eyes. Please don't even get him started. He walked to his and kendalls room, slamming the door loudly. Fuck this. He thought. Not worth it.

Xxxx

There was a knock at Nikkis door as she got up from the table and walked over. She opened the door to see a solomn looking logan. Of course, he wanted to know what was up. She sighed and stepped aside as he walked in. She closed the door and bit her lip nervously.

" So, That fight..." He said softly, getting right to the point.

" Yeah. Well. It was long overdue. You want something to drink?" She said trying to avert the subject. He smiled and nodded and she walked to the fridge. He glanced around.

" Never acutally been in here before. Its huge." He said smiling and thanking her for the coke. She nodded.

" Yeah well, my company pays for it. Might as well go big time right?" He cringed as she referenced there bands slogan. " You can sit," she laughed slightly and he sunk into her black sponge couch, similar to the one in the crib.

" So, what happened?" She sighed.

" I couldn't handle it." She looked away. " It was like something inside me snapped and everything I felt toward him came out especially after he kissed me-" Logan paled and shot me a look.

" W-W-Wait he kissed you? Like Kissed you kissed you?" Logan stated slightly jittery. She bit her lip again.

" Yes?" She made a face of guilt. Logan sighed and his head lawled back.

" Fucking a james." Nikki had never heard logan curse before. Not gonna lie she kind of enjoyed it.

" Ugh."

" Its whatever, thats what the fight was about." Logan looked at me once more.

" Im sorry, he thinks he can get anything with a vag." I laughed.

" yeah well all except me. I work off of personality and let me tell you his isn't the best ive seen." Logan laughed.

" Yeah whos the best you've seen?" She looked up.

" Yours." His face softened. " But I mean, were friends. And thats what we'll always be, and to be honest having a guy, as a friend is the best." Logan smiled warmly. " I can play video games and I can go to you for advice." He nodded and hugged her. She burried her face into his neck. It smelled like tommy hilfigure cologne. When they broke apart She smiled to him deviously.

" sooo, Whos camille?" He opened his mouth in confusion. " I met her a couple of hours ago." He mouthed an oh and bit his lip.

" Just a friend. We used to date but shes dating this other guy steve and-" Nikki gasped and punched him playfully. " What?"

" Logie, Shes hott. Why on earth did you guys break up?" he looked down.

" James kind of made out with her." Nikki snorted.

" Figures. Doesn't he usually do that to you guys? Steal your women?" Logan laughed and shook his head.

" Nah, camille is just as much to blame. She was rehearsing with him and she went in for it twice." Nikki nodded in understanding.

" Sorry, I didn't know." He waved it off.

" Eh, its whatever."

xx

(2months later- June)

Nikki sat in the lounge chair next to carlos logan and kendall who were all reading a different magazine. She stretched out and pulled her tank top off letting the sun caress her pake skin. She smiled and leaned back. Suddenly she heard logan and kendall curse under there breath and she lifted her sunglasses.

" What?" She said lifting them on her head starring at them. They shook there heads.

" How the hell did you sit still for that tattoo?" Logan said pushing her forward to see the beautiful sillohuette of a tree, with a couple of ravens flying away, it continued on her right side with some flower work and a quote under her right breast. She laughed and looked at them.

" acutally very easily. You like it?" Both Kendall and logan wordlessly nodded and examined it some more. Carlos soon noticed and gasped.

" Whoa! Did you draw that?" He questioned. Nikki nodded and bit her lip. " Cool! Do you have anymore?" She nodded and slipped off her shorts reveiling her thighs, one sported a pistol surrounded by Red roses with the words, Forever free. On her other thigh, she had a intricate angel portrait of a little girl praying and under it read : phil 4:13. Kendall admired the artwork as well tracing his finger over it. Nikki giggled as he found her tickle spot on her side. He laughed.

" Hey guys," Everyone looked up to see james standing there with a girl. She was blonde and had bright blue eyes, she was wearing a skimpy bathingsuit that barely coverd her ass cheeks. Nikki bit her lip and leaned back again going back to her magazine, yeah she was the least bit interested in this one. James had been going through girls each week. One per week.

The first one he braught home after there fight had black hair and green eyes. Just like nikki. But he soon dumped her a week later because she chewed with her mouth open and didn't like kendall. The second one was a cute funny red head, she lasted about 2 weeks, Everyone thought she was nice. That is until they found out she wouldn't laugh. Apparently she had no sense of humor. The third was a brunette, she lasted a week. Mainly because she didn't understand a lick of english. The fourth was a blonde, she was also extremely conservative. She lasted a week. The fifth was a tall skinny brunette. She was a model. Beautiful girl, no personality what so ever. Once again. She lasted 7days. The 6th we thought was a keeper until she cried because she spilled her coke all over the floor. She lasted a good two weeks.

So james was back with this girl and she looked like she was bored. She awkwardly waved to us all.

" This is Nora." He introduced her and once again they all mumbled hey. Nikki was unamused at his attempts to get her jelouse, She knew it and even logan figured it out. Poor girl probably had a week. " She wants to be a singer, isn't that cool?" They all nodded . The two grabbed lounge chairs and placed it next to nikki at the end. She sighed when james pulled nora to him and kissed her passionatly. Cute, nikki thought. 10 minutes later and they have yet to break apart. Nikki got up and walked into the lobby, everyone starred after her including james who broke away from nora. She didn't bother saying goodbye as she was too sick to her stomach for words.

Logan got up and followed her inside also not saying goodbye as he was slightly concerned for her at the moment. Everyone then starred at him. Suddenly kendall laughed.

" What?" James asked. Kendall put down his magazine shaking his head.

" Figures he'd go after her. They've been inseperable since she got here." Kendall said smiling. James coughed on his soda and starred kendall down.

" What-uhm...What do you mean by that?" james said shakely. Kendall shrugged.

" Me and carlos have a bet going how long its gonna take them to reveal that they're dating." he said nonchalantly. James started to laugh nervously.

" You don't acutally believe that ...do you?" HE asked scared of the answer.

" I do actually. Why?" james looked away from kendall.

" No reason.." He said leaning back.

" They'd so cute together." Carlos said smiling behind his drink. James paled at the thought but put on a face of uncaring. Oh please, they're not dating. That would be rediculos right? Right. James thought to himself.

xxx

Logan walked into the lobby look around when he spotted camille and steve cuddled up on the couch. His heart started to break all over again. The two turned to each other and sharred a kiss. Fuck, so thats what this feels like to nikki. He thought to himself . Camille caught logans eye and waved to him happily. He smiled a bit and walked away leaving her dumbfounded.

Xxx

Logan ran up the stairs after Nikki who seemed upset. He got to her door and knocked gently.

" Nikki? You there its Logan." He said softly. No answer he sighed and waited 5 minutes. Still no answer. He was about to walk away when he heard her unlock the door and slowly pull it open. She had gotten dressed and was sporting a frown. He sighed and hugged her. She burried her head in his neck.

" Hes an ass nikki you know that." He whispered into her ear. She shook in his arms and he pulled her in tighter. They pulled apart after 5 minutes. She sighed and sat down on the couch.

" Logie?" She said after a couple minutes. He looked at her.

" Whats up nik?"

" Wanna grab a drink? I know a bar that doesnt id." He laughed and thought about it.

" Fuck it why not?" he said helping nikki up as they both walked to the elvator.


	6. Chapter 6

Nicole giggled as logan made a joke. She sipped her red devil and smiled. The smell of alcohol potent on them both. They both shouldn't have been drinking due to there scheduals tomorrow but because of the crap they had to deal with early in the day they felt they deserved it. They had been at the bar for 5 hours now , drinking as much as they could retain and just talking about anything they could think of.

" You know. Camille thinks shes funnay with-that whole makeout thing with steve in fron a me but is not funnay. It was mean..she broke my fuckin heart." logan slurred his words wildly as nikki sighed and nodded. Logan knew drinking wasn't the healthiest choice. But he wasn't thinking right considering his heart was basically ripped from his chest.

" Well, James isn't better. Thinks he can jus walk back into my life. After he fucked me over and now hes with bunch of skanky whores? Fuck that." she said softly. She laid her head on logans shoulder and he played with her hair. " We should figure out a plan to get even." She said sitting up. He scrunched his face.

" You know, ive been listening to you two all night. And In my opinion, they way to get even is simple." Said the bartendar behind them. He was about 25, had shoulder length black hair and was muscular. He didn't look like hed shaved in while and had a thick russian accent. He was smiling at Both logan and nikki as if the answer was obvious. " Date each other. If this guy is his best friend, and likes you then dating each other would be the perfect comeback. And all the while, This camille you like," He said to logan. " Would simply get just as jelous and come back to you. Then you both get them. You see?" Nikki and logan nodded and looked at each other. Date? I mean they had been friends forever, and have acted as if they were dating anyway but actually do it? Nikki laughed nervously as logan looked to be figuring something out. The bartendar smiled and put down a hugs bottle of pinnacle whipped in front of them. " Here take it, Go home then think about it." He said walking away. Nikki grabbed the bottle and smiled.

" Well if were going to do this. How should we start?" Logan asked with a smirk. Nikki hopped off the stool and toward the door all the while logan following her. The hailed a cab and headed back to the palmwoods. It was around 12 at night and usually everyone was a sleep but it was friday so there were a couple of people chilling by the pool and a couple in the lobby. Nikki and logan swayed to the elevator trying not to laugh at the fact that they were so wasted. Suddenly logan fell ontop of nikki and she giggled. Suddenly he looked up at her and pressed his lips to hers. She pulled away confused.

" should we really do this logan? Pretend to date?" He leaned back and looked at her.

" Im trying to see the bad in this plan. But Im not coming up with anything. I mean as soon as they come back to us, We just break up. No feelings. Just over. Right back to being friends." He said turning his head to her. She smiled.

" Promise?" she said smirking devilishly.

" Promise." She bit her lip and jumped ontop of him. He grabbed her and stood up. She gripped the bottle in her hand as he carried her to her door noisely. He tossed her on her couch and ran to the stereo plugging in his ipod. He turned on enjoy the silence by anberlin. She giggled and sat up opening the bottle and sipping it. He laughed and turned around jokingly dancing. He tore off his shirt and swung it around as she kickd off her skinny jeans. She slapped his ass playfully and he grabbed ahold of her swining her around.

" your going to payfor that." He whispered into her ear. She leaned her head back.

" can sex be apart of pretend? No feelings? Just sex." she said softly her eyes closed. He starred at her. " Is that bad?" He shook his head. " Whats wrong then?"

" Im still...a you know.." he looked away embarrased. She giggled.

" So am I. Don't worry about it. We lost our first kiss to each other. Might as well continue tradition." He smirked at her comment. She put down the bottle and ripped off her black tank top tossing it to the floor revealing her bra. She watched him examine her. She walked over to him and he pulled her in tightly Kissing her passionatly till they fell to the floor. She ripped off his jeans as his hand found the curve of her back. He kissed her from the neck , continuing down her breasts and her stomach. She moaned and arched her back in pleasure. He looked at her once more.

" You promise this wont affect us as friends right?" Logan said cautiously. She looked at him and grabbed his face.

" Just friends. That are pretending to date." She said laughing slightly. He smirked and stuck his hand between her legs. She gasped and her nails dug into his back. He smirked and pressed his lips into her neck. He caressed her skin with his tongue and then bit down. She arched her back into him and grabbed hold of the carpet.

Xxxxx

Nikki rolled over as she felt the sun beat down on her from the slider door. What the fuck happened? She thought and saw the empty pinncle bottle with a couple of glasses. She looked to her right and saw logan sprawled out next to Rubbed her eyes and pushed him slightly as he groaned.

"fi-minutes." he mummbled as she pulled the blanket over her bare chest. He then jumped and sat up.

Grabbing his head and moaning in pain. " Fuck me." He massaging his temples.

" I think I did." He laughed and looked to her.

" Wait. Did we..." She nodded and laid back. " How shit faced were we yesterday?" He said laying back down next to her. She shrugged.

" I don't remember I blacked out after we got back." He nodded in agreement. Suddenly there was a knock at the door and nikki sat up covering her body again.

" NIKKI! Its james! IM COMING IN I NEED YOUR HELP ITS AN EMERGENCEY!" james screamed from the other side.

" SHIT- NO JAMES!" but it was too late as he opened the door quickly looking upset.

" Nikki have you seen logan? He didn't come home last night and-" His eyes landed on nikki and logan . He quickly covered his eyes. " Shit! SHIT ! Im sorry bro I didn't know you were..." He said turning around as logan pulled on his underwear and pants. Nikki pulled on her giant shirt and unerpants and hopped up. James turned and looked at logan and nikki who were red in the face. Logan sighed and kissed nikki goodbye.

" remember. Pretending." He said in her ear before he patted james on the back. James starred after him then turned back to nikki. She was biting her finger.

" So, you and logan." He said emotionless. She looked away and started to clean up the empty glasses. James starred at her up and down. He felt his heart break into a million pieces. His best friend and the girl he think he loves were dating. He sighed and walked out. She didn't look back at him, she knew he was hurt. And although it felt good. She didn't know if it would last.

Xxx

James walked angrily back into the crib. Kendall and carlos sat on the couch eating cereal and watching tv. They glanced up when they saw james fuming.

" Yo dude whats wrong?" Asked kendall a mouth full. James smirked and saw logan making a bowl for himself in the kitchen. He shot him a death glare.

" Have you asked where our dear friend logan where he has been all night?" james said crossing his arms. Logan dropped his spoon and coughed on his food. Kendall and carlos starred at him.

" Logan. Where were you?" carlos asked.

"Tell em' logan. Tell them how I just walked in on you And nikki butt naked on her living room floor." Logan sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. Kendall and carlos spit out there milk.

" YOU WERE WHERE?" Kendall and carlos said at the same time. They looked at each other and kendall held his hand out as carlos slipped 10 bucks into it.

" Nice buddy." Kendall said winking. Logan smiled. James starred at him blankly.

" Kendall!" James yelled.

" What?" He said shrugging. " Its cute."

" NO ITS NOT!" james yelled. Logan slammed his dish on the counter and turned to james.

" Why not james? Cause it wasn't you? Cause you lost? Or maybe its because you've been bringing girls home for the past couple of months making that girl feel like shit," He said viciously. James took a couple steps back.

" She cursed me out rememeber?" James replied.

" Yeah james, she had the balls to come back at you with force. Im kinda glad she did. I figured it woulda sunk into your thick, perfect head of hair. But it didn't. Me and nikki have been dating for 3 weeks now. Last night was one of the greatest nights of my life. So what if I have a hang over? And ill probably be puking till tomorrow, it was worth spending an amazing night with a beautiful women who deserves to be with someone who doesn't see her as a one night stand and brag for once in her life. Get over it james. Go have fun with more of those cheeky bitches you've been finding at clubs." Logan finsihed standing over a now sitting james. All three boys mouth hung open in shock. He turned to leave when he saw nikki standing by the doorway with her gym bag. She bit her lip and smiled. A couple of tears staind her face. She wiped them away and he walked over to her. He hugged her closely. He glanced over her shoulder at james. He watched his best friends heart break but for some reason the girl in his arms was a little more important. They broke apart and walked down the hall.

James starred after them. He was hurt. It felt like they had taken a knife to his heart and stabbed it repeatedly. But he couldn't be mad at either of them. Because logan was 100% right. As always. James had basically made Nikki an open chance for anyone to take. And even though he was dating tons of girls on and off it was to only make nikki jelouse. But her dating logan? How could he let his plan backfire so bad.

Xx

Nikki and logan walked hand in hand through the lobby. Nikki had to go to rehersal today and Logan didn't have to be at the studio for a couple hours so he offered to come watch. She accepted his offer and the two chatted casually. Suddenly logan and nikki were face to face with steve and camille. Camilles eyes landed on nikki and logans intertwined hands. She glanced at logan.

" Hey guys, What are you doing?" Camille said leaning into steve. Logan smiled.

" Nothing, going to watch nikki's dance rehersal. You guys?" logan said pulling nikki into his side. Camille's face faltered in confusion.

" Thats cool. So are you two like dating ?"Camille asked hesitantly afraid of the answer. Nikki giggled

" Yeah, We've been dating for 3 weeks now. Just thought we'd let everyone know." She said smiling and cuddling into logan.

" Whoa. Thats um. Great. Congrats." Camille replied. Her face showed unidentifiable emotion as she sighed and said goodbye too nikki and logan walking away quickly with steve.

" That went better then I thought that would go." Logan whispered after looking back. Nikki laughed and they headed to the car.


	7. Chapter 7

Nikki woke up and groaned as he heard her iphone ring next to her. She sighed and grabbed it, She opened the text from logan.

Logiebear (10:30am): Hey Sleepyhead wake up were heading to the beach with the guys today.

She inwardly sighed and sat up rubbing her eyes. For the past 2 weeks the two had become 'public' in a sense, and although it was starting to get fun, everytime she saw james wrap his arm around Nora, the girl he'd picked up a couple of weeks ago, something inside her ached. Sure logan was a good ' Fake' BF but come on, She saw the way logan longed for camille again. The reason she knew that look so well is because she wore it daily around James. But today would be slightly different. Today they were all going to the beach and camille and stever were coming along. She knew logan would want her to dress, special for the days events.

Nikki turned over and pressed play on her ipod. Passion pit filled the room as she jumped up and started to get ready. She always disliked singing in front of people, but she was currently alone and didn't give a flying. Tearing off her shorts and tank , she pulled on her favorite black string bikini. Admiring herself in the mirror, she deffinatly agreed with the boys. She had most deffinatly changed. She had a beautiful waistline, a perfect hourglass. She wasn't too skinny, but wasn't chunky, a more healthy in between. Her hair was semi-thick black and long. It flowed down her back and ended just under her breasts. The humidity of Cali, had taken its toll and kept her hair styled in beach waves. She was still pale though, but didn't mind all that much. She ran to her closet and pulled on a black sundress and flip flops. Still dancing and spinning around her appartment, She didn't notice her door open and someone standing there with a smirk, arms crossed leaning on the doorway.

"Nice moves." Logan said smoothly. Nikki jumped at his voice and turned instantly.

" Don't do that." She said narrowing her eyes. She muttered asshole under her breath and he laughed.

" You ready I figure we can grab a bite to eat while prima donna prepares himself." She knew who he meant instantly and she laughed.

" Yeah come on, im dying for a bagel." He smiled and she closed the door behind him. Upon entering the lobby she received several cat calls and ' damns' as they walked through. Nikki was used to it, but notice logan looking around and she grabbed his hand in reassurance. He smiled.

" guess im not used to having people make inappropriate noises at my girlfriend" He said shurgging. Nikki laughed and they grabbed a taxi. He seemed slightly off today. Nikki noticed him fidgeting and she placed a reassuring hand on his. He looked to her. " So are we ever going to talk about ….you know." He said nervously. Nikki gave him a confused look then realization hit her. Shit she thought.

" Oh, I mean, did you want to talk about it?" She said curiously. He looked down embarrased.

" Well yeah. Kinda. I mean. It was so unexpected. And I don't know." He rubbed the back of his neck.

" Did you...you know...like..it?" He said laughing a little. Nikki giggled and nodded.

" I did acutally, thank you for the concern" she laughed a little. "lets just say, if I had to loose it to anyone in the world, im extremely glad I chose you." she said looked at her again .

" same." he said simply. He squeezed her hand before turning to look out the window once more.

Xxx

When Logan and Nikki returned, the boys had loaded up the two jeep wranglers and split everyone up. Logan and nikki both shared a jeep with of course, James and nora. Logan reassuringly held her hand as she found out. Logan hopped in the drivers seat, nikki crawling in the passengers seat. She watched as james helped nora in the back and he jumped in after her. Sighing nikki turned away, and she felt logans hand on her arm. And soon they took off.

About a 15 minutes rolled by , and nikki glanced in the rear view mirror. She watched as james play tonsill hockey with nora, making obnoxious sounds. Even logan seemed to be getting annoyed. He glanced at nikki ever 5 minutes to make sure she was alright. She was more fuming then upset. She grabbed hold of the ipod cord and plugged her phone in, ruinging the mood for the two face fukers in the back. Nora whined as james shot me a dirty look.

Nikki found crazy bitch by buckcherry and hit play. She saw logan tense up next to her and she simply smirked, knowing james eyes were now on her every move. She eyed him in the rear mirror again and placed her hand on logans thigh, making him shift. She watched as james got more and more angered. Suddenly nikki squeezed logans thigh, making him yelp and swerve, a bit. Logan shot me a look of displeasurement, as james face hardened. Nikki started to mouth the words to crazy bitch, as the battle of the sexually fustrated show offs began. Her hand still wandered betweens logans thighs, and his grip on the steering wheel tightened to an extent of turning his knuckles white.

"Nikki." logan growled through gritted teeth. But lucky enough for him they had just got to the beach. Logan parked the car and james immediately jumped out, Round one went to nikki as he stormed off to the opposite jeep. Nora scoffed and attempted to climb out, but failed miserably. Logan and nikki chuckled under there breath. Nikki made to get out but was stopped when she felt someones hand grab her thigh. She gasped and noticed logan giving her a devilish smile. " You think you can just get off that easy with what you pulled?" he growled. Nikki bit her lip.

" what'd you have in mind?" she asked smirking at him. He glanced around and saw that everyone was busy at the other jeep getting the stuff. He slipped his hand under her dress and she moaned, as she felt his fingers invade her. Grabbing the dashboard for support, she yelped, as he shoved his fingers as far up as he could. His hand covered her mouth queiting her down.

" You guys okay over there?" Kendall yelled as everyone turned to them. Logan smiled.

" YEAH ! We'll be right there!" Logan yelled back. Everyone eyed them suspiciously but went back to what they were doing. Nikki arched her back as he massaged her rhythmicly. She grabbed ahold of him as he thrusted his fingers in and out furiously. She moaned and he gently placed his hand over her mouth. " Shhh, do you want them to come over here?" He said with a smirk. Suddenly he gave her one more thurst and She gasped. He pulled out his hand and kissed her passionatly. " Told you you'd pay." She breathlessly laughed and smacked him.

" Fuck you." she said getting out of the jeep shaking a bit. She grabbed the blankets and umbrellas and logan followed her to where everyone had already set up. She put the stuff down and spread out the blanket. She immediately laid down, trying to calm her nerves from before. Logan laid next to her.

" what took you guys so long?" Carlos asked stretching out on the beach chair.

" Nothing. Just some unfinished business." Logan replied with a wink at nikki. She laughed and rolled her eyes.

" Okay..." Kendall said with question, He shrugged and smiled. " Surfing anyone?" There were a bunch of yeahs all around and the boys grabbed there boards.

" Actually I think im gonna just chill up here." Nikki said sitting up.

" Oh come on its fun." carlos whined. She laughed.

" Maybe later." She said opening her book.

" yeah I think i'll chill up here too!" James suddenly yelled. Nikkis and logans eyes widened. She nodded to logan saying she was alright and he smiled to her before giving her a kiss he knew james would despise him for. Nora made a face at james.

" Well, I wanna surf babe." she said crossing her arms. Nikki rolled my eyes at her. James squinted his eyes and looked up at her.

" So go surf." He said matter of factly.

" Come teach me." She said once again whineingly. He sighed.

" babe, kendalls teaching the girls. Go ask him." He said leaning back in the chair. She narrowed her eyes at him.

" Fine. I will." She said viciously. Nikki snorted inwardly. James eyes immediately fell on her behind his raybans.

" Problem?" He retorted. She shrugged and sighed.

" figures you'd treat your girlfriend that way in front of someone who still hate your guts for being fucked over by you." She said from behind her book. He sat up.

" Well excuse me, I wouldn't have fucked you over, if you hadn't come to LA looking like...like...THAT." He gestured to all of her and she shook her head.

" Sorry for growing up? And besides its not like our friendship before THIS was real anyway. I should've known that you'd drop my ass before middle school." It was his turn to snort.

"Oh please, once again it was entirely my fault. God forbid you attempted to make contact with me before then."

" well I would have if your mouth wasn't plastered to everyones ass and every girls mouth all the time," She sassed with a smirk.

" Well I wished my mouth was plastered to yours...but." He said quietly. She put down the book.

" James. Im not in the mood, okay? Ive been heartbroken, kicked down and shitted on by everyone and there grandmother, I don't need b.s like this from you."

" Maybe you should accept that we'd be perfect together and you wouldn't be so bitchy all the time." She growled.

" I have accepted it. But guess what james, I accepted reality right after I watched you loose it to Becky Steinsburge in 8th grade. So you know what? You can take your fake ass apology and shove it right where it came from. Your ass." She got up and grabbed the keys from logans sweater.

" Where are you going?" James said turning and watching her walk back to the jeep. She turned around.

" Somewhere far as fuck away from you." She retorted back.

" Nikki! NICOLE! NICOLE GET BACK HERE LOGANS GONNA BE PISSED IF YOU TAKE THE JEEP! NIKKI!" She heard james call from in back of her. Yeah right like she was going answer to his selfish self centered fuck of a face. Ugh. Damn him. Not even a fucking beach trip she can enjoy. She jumped in the truck and into the drivers seat. She slammed her fists on the steering wheel, visibly upset. She eyed her bag and bit her lip. Fuck. She thought and reached in and grabbed her pack of ciggerettes that she swore she'd chuck when she got to LA. Little did she know the shitty stress would reappear. Lighting one up, she inhaled and sighed. Oh damn, she thought realizing she had yet to drive away and was in full view of the boys who could come after her about her secret habbit. She popped on her iphone and blasted Solar midnight by Lupe fiasco pulling out, making the tires burn.

Xxxx

" James! JAMES! Hey dude, wheres nikki?" logan said slightly out of breath from running up the beach. Carlos kendall and steve and the girls followed him. James arms were crossed and he was pissed about something.

" Your little girlfriend, took your jeep and tore out of here like it was some fast and furious movie about 20 minutes ago." He Smirked to logan.

" WHAT! WHAT THE HELL JAMES WHY DIDN'T YOU CALL US?" Logan said getting up and looking to the parking lot.

" What'd you do now bro?" Asked kendall looking over as well.

" IM sorry why does everyone assume its my fault?" James said in shock.

" Because it always is dipshit!" Logan said angrily. He grabbed his phone. " Nikki? Babe what happened? Whoa, whoa, whoa. Slow down. What? Where?" His face was pale. He put his head in his head and sighed. "Okay, okay yeah don't worry...yeah uhm, Ill be there in 10 minutes." He ended the call and his eyes went james, who was looking away immaturly. " Seriously. James look at me." He did slowly and reluctantly. " do me a favor. And don't talk to her Or me Ever again if your both going to pull this crap every 5 seconds." He said viciously making everyone back away slightly. James mouth opened. " Im sick of having to be the referee for you done."

" But-"

" DONE." He said grabbing the keys from kendall. James held his hands up in defense.

Xxxxx

" Did it work?" Nikki said with a smile. Logan nodded and smiled holding up the bag of chineese food. She clapped and let him into the dance studio. " mmm finally!"

" what did he say to you?" She smirked at him and crossed her arms.

" Same old crap. About how he loved me and its my fault we lost our about you?" She said taking out all the food and putting it on the blanket she set out on the wood floor. He shrugged.

" Same old also. I just told him not to talk to either of us ever again and that I was tierd of playing referee for you both." He didn't look up and nikki frownd.

" Im sorry. I don't blame you. This is all my fault. IM sorry I should've never pressured you into this dating thing-" He stopped her and put his hand on her leg.

" We both agreed remember? And don't be sorry. He starts it. So im sorry." She side smiled in acknowledgement and went back to eating her plain lo mein. " So why does it smell like cigarettes?" He once again didn't make eye contact and she chocked on her soda.

" fuck." She whispred. " I uhm. Yeah sorry. I got stressed..." She trailed off.

" You smoke when your stressed?" Logans eyes burned into her. She sighed.

" Yeah. I started after I moved to NYC."

" Why though? Of like all the things, why smoking? Why not like eating or something?" He said sourly.

" I don't know logan. I don't do it that often, its not like I sing or anything so its no big deal." He swallowed and eyed her.

" Didn't you want to be a singer and dancer? Do you still sing? Or did you like end that?" She pursed her lips.

" If I knew you were going to be an ass I would've stayed here by myself." She snapped. HE looked up. He was finally fed up with this not caring act. She'd been putting it on for a while now.

" Well. Maybe you should start putting your life in perspective. Like not smoke, or you can apply for a role on broadway or theater."

" Logan just. Stop." He put his food down.

" Why? So I can watch you throw you talent away? No."

" Logan. I haven't acted or sang since like 6th grade." she laughed.

" So? I never sang in my life before a couple years ago, yet look where I am now." He said crossing his arms. Fuck. He was right. As usual she thought.

" So you win logan you officially have bigger balls then me." she said grudingly. He starred her down, narrowing his eyes at her comment. " What? IM admitting your right."

" Yeah and yet your still going to ignore me. Have you even tried to pursue singing? IM sure you'd become a triple threat if you can act too, which you can." he said knowingly.

" No... I can't." He sighed. " Well I can't jeeze, logan what the hell has got you so wound up?" She could tell he wasn't going to budge on anything that he said. She knew he was right, but she had stuck to dancing for a long time, taking time away from it would feel weird.

" Nikki, im serious. Why toss out your other talents. I remember when you sang in the middle school play. You braught half the crowd to tears-" She slammed her fist down on the table making him jump.

" DAMN IT LOGAN." She screamed shutting her eyes tightly, trying to block out the memories. " Sorry." She said noticing his shocked face. " Sorry, it's just...That was before my life basically went to shit." His hand found hers and he tightened his grip.

" I just want you show the world just how much of a threat you are. Especially all those people who put you down." She knew who was referring too. She sighed and rubbed her eyes with her palms. " Ill help. Ill text camille and ask her for her audtions sheet." He whipped out his phone and quickly typed a message. Almost immediately he got a response back and smiled. " She has about 4 for you to try." She sighed.

" Oh yeah? And if I blow it?" She said crossing her arms.

" You won't. And if you do, suck it up and start over." He said taking a bite of his egg roll.

" Fine." She said stuffing her mouth with lo mein. Here we go again, she thought, to bad he didn't know her life in New York. He'd probably think twice if he did.


	8. Chapter 8

" Nikki. Nikki. NIKKI!" Someone yelled above her. She gasped and jumped. Logan sat happily on the opposite side of her bed with a smirk. " Nice pjs." he said gesturing to her half naked anatomy. She narrowed her eyes and pulled the blanket over her bottom half.

" Logan, Its 9am. What the fuck could you possibly want?" She said growling and falling back down on the pillow.

" I got you a surprise." He frowned and sad mockingly hurt.

" what is it?" She said from under the comforter.

" You'll have to get up and see now won't you?" He said as he jumped off the bed and walked out. Disgruntled, she sat up and got ready.

Xxx

" Logan seriously, can you just tell me where were-" But he took his hands off her eyes letting her take in the new surroundings. She covered her mouth and gasped. " Oh my god, logan." She starred down at the red velevet seats and red curtains surrounding the stage where she stood. She looked over and saw the spot lights, that shadowed her. It had been a couple weeks since they had there talk and logan kept his word, secretly helping her build her voice back up and increase her acting skills. She turned to him.

" Told you you'd like it." He said smirking and jumping off the stage. " Now, lets here that Monolauge that you've been working on for the audtion tomorrow." He said sitting front row. She gulped. Taking a deep breath she starred up to the spotlight.

"My great great great... great uncle was a signer of the decleration of independance and my mother's side started building new york before the revolution. You get the idea." She paused closing her eyes, somehow she wasn't sure about doing this monolauge anymore. It hit to close home base, but she kept going." I went to a party once and there was a palm reader there. When she looked at my hands she just. She froze. And I said to her "I know. My life line is broken. I know I won't live past 30". You know those photos of smiling families you always see on a mantlepiece? I can't even look at them cause you never know what they're hiding. A life magazine photographer came to our house to photograph the "Ideal American Family". And we looked happy and pretty but... underneath, it just wasn't that way at all." Surprised that a tear happened to escape her eye, she took a deep breath and starred at logan. He stood up and clapped his hands vigorously.

" And you said you couldn't act." he crossed his arms. She looked away red in the cheeks. " Okay song time, what did you choose?" he said eyeing her.

" Uhm." she said walking over to the piano and tucking her white sundress under her legs. She eyed the black and white ivorys, making her shake a bit. It had been years since she played. IF she could even remember. She cracked her knuckles and inhaled. Suddenly, as if she had never stopped her fingers glided over each key. She opened her mouth and belted out the lyrics to Annie by Vanessa carlton. It was challenging but it was a song she had always wanted to play.She finished the song and smiled to herself.

" Nicole that was...The most beautiful thing i've ever heard." Logan spoke softly, leaning his back against the baby grand. She didn't look at him but merrily grazed her finger tips along the keys.

" I always wanted to play for audience, you know? My parents, they never wanted to listen to me play. They only shoved me off to classes so they wouldn't have to take care of me." She said sounding fagile.

" Well, they did a damn good thing sending you there. Otherwise you'd be lost." Logan replied placing a kiss atop her head. She closed her eyes.

" But I didn't know it would be painful..." She said trailing off. " Being alone for all of my life. Imagine your parents not loving you." Logan sat on the bench next to her, placing his arm around her waist and pulling her close.

" They loved you nikki, You know they did." He said brushing the hair from her face. Her face contorted a bit and tears began to fall again.

" Then why did they leave?..." he tightened his lips at the question. Why does anyone leave? How could he tell her they were afraid? He couldn't. " They left, just like james did." He tightened his grip on her then pulled away. Making sure she was facing him and had full eye contact with her, he grabbed her cheeks in his hands.

" I don't know why parents get divorced, but james left because he was afraid. He was a complete idio to leave you when you needed someone most. And everyday, I thank god I was there for you. Because if I hadn't been. I would've never gotten the chance to be here with you now..." He said trailing off. She sniffled and smiled.

" Logan, Camille may be a sweet girl but shes just as stupid for leaving you." She said pulling him for a hug. He rubbed her back and they pulled apart again.

" Your going to nailt that audtion Nikki, I know it for a fact." he siad interlacing his fingers with hers. She smiled and nodded.

" I can only pray." she said laughing lightly.

Xxx

Nikki nervously pulled at her dress hem. Being nervous was an understatement. Today was her audtion. She paced backstage nervously. Logan was talking to her, but it was going in one ear and out the other.

" Nikki Stop biting your lip, your going to bleed." he said gripping her hand tightly. She wasn't ready for this. She should have never agreed to this. To any of this.

" I can't do this. Im leaving." She said swiftly turning around, logan pulled her back and gripped her shoulders.

" Just breathe. This is nothing. You got this." He said smiling a bit. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath nodding. Logan handed her the script. She sighed and looked to the entrance for the stage. A blonde girl and another in a marilyn wig made chocking gestures in her direction. She slowly made her way up.

" NICOLETTE SIVINI!" a thick british accent boomed over the auditorium. She gracefully walked to the middle, the spotlight once again shinging her down. She smiled a bit. She glanced at the producers and noticed the scruffy british one eyeing her suspiciously. " Reading for?" He said flipping through some papers.

" Marilyn Monroe." She said smoothly. His head shot up and suddenly he was fully aware of her presence. She took a deep breath in.

" Start with your song first please." He announced suddenly. Nikkis head shot in the direction of side stage where logan was smiling encouragingly. She nodded and walked over to the black baby grand. She tucked her dress under her once more and started to play. Closing her eyes she began the vocals. She knew everyons eyes were on her. When she finished she stood up and walked back center stage. The british guy, who she assumed was the director rolled his eyes at her, looking unamused and sat forward into the mic.

" Ms. Sivini. Read your monologue." she once again obeyed. This time she put even more feeling behind it and didn't care a couple of tears fell. It was more from nerves then the actual speech. The room fell silent as she finished. The director looked down at his nots biting his pen, laughing a bit under his breath. " Was that all ?" He added in a sarcastic note.

" Excuse me?" She said putting her hands on her hips and slamming the script on the stage. He looked up.

" Nikki come on lets go-" Logan said coming to the stage to drag her off but she pulled away and held her hand up crossing her arms and locking her leg. The director crossed his in turn challenging her.

" Problem?" He smirked.

" Yeah, actually I do. What was so funny?" She said viciously. He looked taken aback.

" That crap of a speech you put on. I mean really, this is bloody marilyn monroe, you think your going to win us over with that shit. Come on sweetheart get real," He gestured to her. Logan gulped, knowing this guy was now in a world of shit.

" Acutally, yeah I really friggen thought it would. Do you even know where that was from? Or were you to busy with your head lodged up your ass to find out? And another thing, I can tell that im not going to get the part, why? Because im not blonde, arrogant or look like any of those fake skanks that come to this stage. But my talent speaks more for me then my appearance. So if you want to sit there and judge me by all fucking means do so, but don't you dare say that im untalented." Everyones jaw dropped. She gave a curtsey and sarcatically smiled. " Good day sir." She added walking off the stage logan trailing behind her. The other girls glared her down as she tore off her 50's heels and pulled the clip out from her long black hair letting it fall all around her. She was fuming.

" Nikki WAIT UP!" Logan gasped behind her, she kept walking and threw open the double doors. She was humiliated. Outraged.

" I can't BELIEVE YOU MADE ME DO THAT! IM SUCH AN IDIOT! HOW ON EARTH WAS THIS A GOOD FUCKING IDEA?" she said whipping around as he ran up to her. Catching his breath.

" It was your first one you've got a couple more-"

" NO! Logan im going back to dancing. My instructor is going to kill me. And im not loosing what I have now for this b.s-" Suddenly nikki heard her ringtone go off and she flipped it open. " WHAT? I mean sorry hello?" She said rubbing her forhead. " Im sorry who is this?...Okay...uh-huh...alright." She said hitting end and looking up at logan confused.

" Who was that?" he asked scrunching his face.

" That was Derek... the director." She said starring blankly at the phone.

" what?"

" I got the part." she said looking up just as confused.

" You got the part."

" I got the part."

" YOU GOT THE PART!" He said wrapping his arms around her waist and spinning her around. She covered her mouth with her hands.

"oh my god. Logan I got the fucking part. Im playing Marilyn Monroe." she said shaking her head in disbelief.

" why are you so shocked? Thats how kendall and us got our jobs. Sometimes obnoxcious people need to be put into place." He said with a smirk.

Xxx

Nikki grabbed the popcorn from the microwave casually walking over to her couch, suddenly someone burst through the door making her jump. It was logan, he was soaking wet and out of breath.

" Dude what the fuck?" She said until he ran over and shushed her by placing his hand on her mouth.

" Okay, so I kinda sorta made a bet with the guys about something unimportant, and they've been trying to get me to stay in the pool, but its FREEZING and I chickened out and managed to escape and ran to you. Please hide me?" He said all in one breath, raising his eyebrows. There was a knock on the door.

" LOGAN! WE KNOW YOUR IN THERE!" Screamed kendall behind the wood. She cursed under her breath pushing him into the bathroom.

" What are you gonna do?" logan asked as nikki looked around frantically. Suddenly she smiled and tore off her top and sweats throwing them at him. He eyed her red laungiere and his mouth hung open.

"Distraction time." she said wickedly as she pulled the bathroom door shut. Sighing she grabbed her black silk robe and messed up her hair a bit. Slowly pullnig open the door, she smirked as kendall, carlos and james froze , there eyes traveling up and down her body.

" Is...is a...ahhh. Uhmmm. Log-logan in there ?" Kendall managed to mutter trying to keep his eyes on hers.

" mmm yeah but hes alittle busy right now, can I take a message?" She said twisting a piece of her hair in between her fingers.

" well...uh...can..uhm.." carlos stumbled.

" Can we borrow him?" Kendall said smirking.

" Nope." There faces fell.

" why not?" James said loudly narrowing his eyes at her.

" Because. Hes mine as of tonight. See you boys in the morning." She said closing the door and leaving them stand there still in shock. She crossed her arms. " Okay smart ass your spending the night. They think i've captured you or something." He popped out and smiled dumbly.

" You should use..." He gestured up and down her body. " More often. It works to a great advantage." he said tossing her her clothes.

" Nope these are special tools only." he smirked and rolled his eyes falling on the couch.

" Welp, im stealing your popcorn." he siad shoving some in his mouth.

" Suck it logiekinz. This is my bowl." she said grabbing it and walking to her bedroom.


	9. Chapter 9

" Do I have to go?" Nikki said whining and rummaging through her closet. Logan sat on her bed checking his phone every 5 seconds.

"YES! Were dating I can't go to a red carpet event alone. Besides everyone else is bringing dates-i like the black ones." He said pointing to her 6 inch black spike heels. She was wearing long black halter top gown that was cut down her right thigh and widely around her chest. It had a matalic flair to it and she was going through her 20 pairs of black heels to find one that would look good.

" These?" She held them up and he nodded. " Yeah but logan, I fucking hate social events, besides I have my first rehersal tomorrow night I don't need this stress- Black or silver chain necklace?" he pointed to the silver and she nodded.

" Nikki its not that bad, your not the one getting the award Big time rush is, so you don't have to leave your seat- black clutch with those metalic hoop earings and your spiked bracelets- Just sit and enjoy the boos." He said crossing his arms. She twisted her mouth in thought and then pulled on her shoes. She stood up and looked into the mirror. Her black hair was pulled into a tight side bun. He smiled into the reflection. " Beautiful as ever." She smiled and grabbed her bag.

" lets go before I change my mind." He laughed a bit and they headed to the lobby. Everyone starred at her, admiring every bit of her and the dress. She bit her lip nervously. " They're starring." She said through gritted teeth. He shrugged.

"Thats because you look breathtaking." he whispered in her ear as she saw kendall, james, and carlos come down with Lucy, Nora and One of the jennifers. They're eyes all went from admiring Nora and her white silk gown to Nikkis attire.

" Nikki you look effin hott." Lucy said eyeing her up and down.

" You really do!" Jennifer said playing with her bracelets. Nora glared her down, arms crossed and tensed up. She spotted james whos eyes were bulging out of his head. Nikki realized he was basically undressing her with his eyes and she rolled hers in response.

Xxx

Nikki nervously fidgetted with her fingers as they pulled up the venue. Logans hand intertwined with hers, james eyes bruned into him as nora's burned into nikki. Logan whispered something in Nikki's ear making her giggle. James bit on his tounge cautiously to make sure he wasn't going to say anything he'd regret. He looked at nora who was starring daggers at nikki and he sighed. He didn't want to lead her on, it was mean. He's usually better then that. But everytime he saw logan and nikki it made his heart shatter over and over again. All he did was want her. And now, hes driven her to date his best friend. She looked so beautiful tonight, flawless even he thought.

" Here we go!" Kendall said snapping james from his thoughts. They all exited the limo, james eyes never leaving nikki. Logan helped her out as she stood up letting her gown fall around her. Streams of photographers and flashes of lights blew up around her. She gripped logans hand as he led them down the red path briskly. He waved at a few people, and answered a couple questions. Nikki merrily smiled and stood next to him, only speaking when spoken to.

" And who is this lovely lady?" A blonde reporter asked logan as he finished up with mtv news. He turned to the man and smiled. He pushed nikki forward abit.

" My beautiful girlfriend. Nikki Sivini." He said as the reporter smiled.

" And Is she working on anything big Mr. Mitchell?" The reporter said holding out a recorder. Logan smiled.

" Acutally she's in a play about Marilyn Monroe. Its in the theater distract around LA."

" Fascinating, who will she be portraying?" The reporter asked hastily.

" Marilyn Monroe of course." He said rolling his eyes with a smirk. He took hold of nikki once more and they headed into the venue. When they arrived at there seats, nikki sat reluctantly in between logan and james. Sighing she grabbed her champaigne and downed half of it in less then 30 seconds. Everyone starred at her. She put it down.

" What?" She said viciously as they jumped and went back to what they were doing. Logan snorted.

" What'd I do?"

" I don't think ive ever seen someone so eger to get drunk." She smirked at him as he smiled wickedly.

" Sorry, Id rather not be sober for very long as im stuck next to prima donna and his whore." She whispred. Logan laughed into his drink and it splashed everywhere. She giggled and everyone eyed them.

" What now?" she said her smiling falling. They looked away shaking there heads. Logan spotted a familiar face and his smile fell as well.

" Shit." Everyone looked to him. Nikkis eyes followed his. " Camilles here. And shes with steve" Nikki coughed on her champaigne and cursed as well.

" Logan I don't get why you broke up with her." Jennifer said folding her napkin. Nikki's eyes narrowed.

" She made out with his best friend you ditz." Nikki spat deffensivly. Everyone starred at her in shock.

" Well I mean, if he still loves her why break it off over something so small. I mean he forgave james." Lucy added. Nikki noticed logans face paling as he looked down.

" yeah but that was different..." He trailed off.

" How so?" Jennifer said.

" Yeah how is that different?" Nora pitched in.

" I mean its not like she wasn't sorry. She even said she was." Lucy stated.

" Because me and logan are dating now. And Im way better at sex and pleasuring then she is." Nikki said matter of factly. James, kendall and carlos coughed into there drinks and all the girls at the table widened there eyes. Logan laughed loudly as she giggled along wit him.

" Tis' true." He said with a wink. James shifted uncomfortably next to her.

" Victory sex tonight even if you loose?" She suggested holding her glass to his.

" To victory sex if we loose!" he said clinking it next to hers. She downed the rest and called the waitor over grabbing the menu.

" Hey dude, are all these free?" She said gesturing to the wines and cocktails he nodded. " Bitchin' Can I get 2 red devils, a whiskey sour with coke, a glass of merlot and 4 jello shots." He nodded and she turned back to the table. " What? Im thirsty."

" Isn't that a little bit much on the alcohol?" James said in concern.

" No, ive done a 4 pitchers of Budwiser in 2 hours. I think I can fucking handle my boos." she said holding up a hand in his face.

" no way you did 4 pitchers?" Kendall said in disbelief.

" hell yeah. I went to a couple country tail gate parties in texas awhile back with my friend. Rascall flatts and Toby keith. IT was pretty friggen awsome no lie." She said innocently.

" Are you like... an alcoholic?" Nora said from behind james. Everyone eyed her. Nikki leaned over to see her.

" Tottally And damn proud of it." She said with a smirk. The waitor came back and she clapped her hands together licking her lips. She passed two jello shots to logan who eyed them.

" I don't know nikki...remember last time?" he said cautiously.

" Yeah, and I enjoyed drunk sex." She said dowing her too shots and wincing her eyes shut. He shrugged and down his as well , earning glances of disbelief from his friends.

" What have you done to our logie?" Kendall said in shock.

" De-bitchified him." Nikki said holding her nose and sipping her whiskey sour. " Shit thats strong, I think he forgot the coke." She said closing her eyes in pain. " here you go logie." she said pushing it toward him he starred at it and licked his lips. " You know you want tooooo." she said teasingly.

" Dude." James said cautiously. Logan ignored him and sipped at the drink, making faces and smiling.

" Shit that IS strong." he said putting it down inhaling sharply. Giggling nikki sipped at her melot.

" Don't be babies guys, take a sip." She said as logan handed it to kendall and carlos, They pursed there lips at the taste. When it was james turn, He took a gulp and shrugged.

" Not that bad." he said smiling. Nikki rolled her eyes.

The lights started to die down. As the ceremony began, people cheered for the opening act.

Xxxx

Soon it was time for the nominees of Favorite boy band . Nikki watched as all the boys tensed up as they listed the applicants.

" The nominees are as follows, One direction, The wanted, and Big time rush!" The announcer said. Nikki placed her hand over logans as he bit the nails of the other. " The winner is...BIG TIME RUSH!" The boys jumped up and hugged each other. James kissed nora as jennifer pulled carlos in for one. Surprised, nikki was grabbed by logan pulling her into his lips. The boys ran up to the stage.

" We Want to thank all of our fans! AND OUR LABLE! ESPECIALLY GUSTAVO WHO ALTHOUGH IS TOUGH, WE WOULD NEVER BE HERE WITHOUT YOU GIVING US A CHANCE!" Kendall yelled as james held the award up in victory. Nikki clapped excitedly as the boys headed back to the table.

Xxx

Nikki stumbled back to the appartment with logan in tow, they were laughing loudly as they grabbed the walls for support. Kendall and the others were only slightly tipsy, and attempting to guide nikki and logan to the doors.

" Im gun-gunna go back to my beddy bye." Logan murmmured, nikki giggled and tripped over her heels, making logan laugh. James caught nikki as she then tripped on her dress. Sighing, james hauled her up and wrapped an arm around her for support. Nora has been dropped off at her appartment before arriving back at the palmwoods. Lucy and jennifer bid the guys goodbye and walked back to there rooms. Kendall caught ahold of logans arm as he fell against the wall.

" Okay clearly they need to be split up." Kendall said as carlos helped him with logan. " James why don't you take nikki back and we'll get logan into bed." He said concerned. James nodded, picking nikki up and tossing her over his shoulder. She giggled and slapped his butt.

" Nice ass, there jamie. Big buns of steel!" She yelled as he shook his head with a smirk.

" You are never aloud to drink again." He said rolling his eyes.

" oh please you loveeeee it."

" God so much." he stated sarcastically putting her down against the wall next to her door. She handed him the key. He went to unlock it when he saw her slide down. He grabbed her, supporting her small frame as her head lawled back and forth. He pushed open her door and picked her up once more, heading to her bedroom. He stood her back up holding her around the waist for support. " Nikki where are your pjs?" he said looking around. She lazily pointed to the drawer behind him and he grabbed her shorts and tank. She leaned her head against his chest. He bit his lip as he felt her nuzzled her nose into his sternum.

" You smell amazing." She whispered into him. He laughed a little.

" Thank you. Now are you able to you know... Get undressed?" She narrowed her eyes at him. She placed her finger on his nose.

" nu-o." She said and then swayed a bit. He grabbed her just in case. Sighing he looked down at her.

" I won't look. Arms up." He said non chalantly. He should have been more excited, seeing as he was dying to see her nude as it was but she reaked of alcohol and was barely coherent. He slowly undid the button on the back of her halter, then cautiously unzipped the backside of her gown, it fell loosely around her ankles. His eyes were so tempted to look but he kept looking into hers. He knew she was braless, but he put the tank top over her before he had any other urges. She giggled. "whats so funny?" She shook her head.

" Someone excited to see me naked," She said slurring her words. James blushed and looked away.

" Hold onto neck." She did as he instructed and he slowly pulled on her flannle shorts. His hands rested on each cheek of her bum. He looked up. " Done." She placed her finger on his lips.

" jamie?" She asked her eyes closed.

" yes?" He said gulping.

" do you love me?" Caught off guard james swayed a bit himself. Did she just ask that? Was he drunk to or did those words escape those beautiful cherry red lips.

" Excuse me...?" He said softly.

" I said d-do You love me?" She slurred once more. He bit his lip once more starring into her eyes.

" Nikki, I don't think I ever stopped loving you. And I don't think ill stop anytime soon." He said lifting her up and placing her under the covers. Her eyes teared up and she didn't respond, instead she just let him take care of her. He pulled a garbage can over to the side of her bed. " puke in this if you need to, call me if you need me no matter what time. Now I have to go check on your boyfriend." He said placing his cool lips on her clamy forhead. " Goodnight." He said walking out of the room. He felt a pang in his chest. He just openly addmitted loving her and didn't think twice about the fact that his best friend is dating her. He closed her door and leaned against it pondering what just went down. All he wanted to do was go back in there and cuddle up next to her, bring her into his chest and fall asleep with her.

" Im a fucking idiot." he said lowly.

" whys that?" He whipped around to see camille standing there with a smirk

" Uh...nothing no. Uhm. I was just-" he stumbled over his words.

" So, what do you think about nikki and logan?" She asked after a few minutes not making eye contact.

" I..i..." But one look at her and he sighed rubbing his eyes. " I fucking hate it." He said laughing a bit. She laughed a little as well leaning against the wall next to him.

" Never thought id say this, but same here." James looked at her shocked.

"really?" He said in disbelief. She looked up at him, her eyes a bit teary.

" Really." she said in a deffinate tone. James nodded.

" we have to split them up. I don't think I can handle this torture anymore." James said ashamed.

" Im in." He looked at camille as she held up her hand.

" What about nora though? And steve?"

" Steve, is...i don't know. I don't have the same spark I did with logan. Steves a great guy but, with logan I felt like...like I could see myself in the future with him. He was the one who just brightened up my day." Camille said sadly. " What about nora?"

" Shes so dull. She doesn't do anything but whine and complain. Nikki...nikkis like a breath of fresh air. She always knew how to make me relax and smile and enjoy life. I hurt her though, and I regret everyday we lost our friendship. When I saw her in the lobby that day I...i... I just- everything came flooding back. The emotions, the memories. And I just fell in love, all over again."

" We need to break them up." camille said starring at james.

" we do. But how?"

" We'll figure it out. Meet me in the lobby tomorrow at 1. I think I have a plan." She said walking away and telling him goodnight. James starred into the distance, he knew what they were about to do was so low and wrong it could be considered a mortal sin. But james knew that if they didn't split them up soon, he'd have a full mental breakdown. And camille was in the same situation as him. It may be wrong he thought and the consequences were probably horrifying but love was always a great disadvantage.


	10. Chapter 10

Nikki and the boys sat in the kitchen eating lunch. Logan and her had hangovers from the other night and the boys had rehersal today as did she. She wasn't exactly in the mood for it but sucked it up. James kept eyeing her suspiciously from behind his drink. She pretended nothing was wrong and kept eating. The lunch was awkward enough, but then nora came and james became tense almost instantly. She placed a kiss on his lips but his eyes stayed on nikki. Nora sat ontop of james lap, and nikkis eyes darted back to her plate.

" You know, some of us are hungry and don't feel like loosing our appitite starring at you two." She growled pushing around her macaronie. Everyone starred at her in disbelief. She looked up. " Oh please, im not the only one thinking it." she said dropping her fork ,and glarring down nora. Nora narrowed her eyes at her.

" Well looks like your gonna just have to get over it. Im surprised your able to even stand from all the alcohol you inhaled yesterday." She said snarkaly.

" Aww is someone jelouse I can handle my boos and have a good time instead of being an uptight fake blonde skank?" Nikki said in mock hurt. She gasped.

" At least im not little miss ghetto from the hood, whos jelouse cause I can afford to buy whatever I please." She snapped.

" What are you trying to say princess? That just because you have your daddys money you think your better then me? At least I work for what I have." Nora snorted.

" Oh please honey, I KNOW im better then you. Its not my fault your parents were poor and split up because there daughter was a dorky little whore."

" WHOA FUCK NORA." Logan said eyeing her in disbelief. Nikki closed her mouth and turned to james emotionless.

" you told her?" Was all she said before standing up slowly and turning back to scared looking nora. " You know what. At least my parents loved me, and I feel bad for you. Because I unlike you didn't have to fill my life with material things to feel loved. And I sure as fuck, don't have to sleep with every guy to prove my point, unlike you. So enjoy getting everything you want right now, because all you'll ever be is a spoiled, concieded two faced slutty little BITCH." Nikki seethed, each word like venom off her tongue. Everyone starred at her wide eyed with there jaws to the floor.

" Nikki, take that back." She heard james say next to her. She shot her eyes to him and back at nora then back to him.

" Excuse me?" She said dangerously crossing her arms.

" Apologize, that was uncalled for." James said quietly not making eye contact with her. Nora cheekly smiled to nikki crossing her arms.

" Yeah take it back. I always win sweetheart." Nora stated as nikki walked up to her face and glared her down to hell.

" Enjoy your wide varities of STDS, you contaminated slut." Nora gasped, they both looked to james. " And you, I will never forgive you for what you just pulled. We are so done, its not even funny. Come near me again, and I will claw your fucking eyes out." She said softly. Nikki slowly made her way out of 2J, logan trailing behind her. Before he left he turned to james.

" By the way, friendship. Over."

" Logan-" Kendall tried to reason with him after getting over the shock of things.

" No, I gave him a chance. He just blew it." Logan spat. James refused to look up. Logan shook his head and ran after nikki. Everyone glared at james and nora. Nora wore a smirk of victory.

" Dude who are you anymore?" Carlos said also running out.

" Babe, that was uncalled for." James muttered. Nora stood up and starred daggers at him.

" Excuse me? She was insulting me. I will not be talked down too , especially by someone like her. Screw this. If your not going to defend me, then you can kiss my ass. WE'RE DONE." She said grabbing her bag and stomping out of the appartment.

" So.." Kendall said walking over to james sitting down across from him. " Why didn't you go after her?..."

" Who?" James said looking up finally to face his friend.

" Nora."

" Because. I wasn't happy with her. At all." He said looking back down like a child under interegation. Kendall sighed.

" Well now you lost them both. And I have no idea how you are ever going to redeem yourself from this one." With that kendall gotup and started to clear the table. James sat there and pondered. Suddenly his phone buzzed. Oh shit he thought, camille. He got up quickly and ran to the elevator, ignoring kendalls calls.

xxxx

Logan walked back into the crib after an hour or so. He sat at the table and rested his head in his hands, unable whether to give james another chance or completely ignore the ass. Of course he loved james, but he had changed.

" Hey buddy." Kendall said from behind him clapping him on the back. " Whats up?"

" He's changed." Logan replied. Kendall sighed and sat across from him. " The old james would've dumped her in seconds-"

" He did. You ran out to fast to watch. But he told nora to leave because she had no right to say that crap. He cares logan. Trust me. He cares." Kendall said getting up. " Come on we have rehersal."

Xxx

James arrived in the lobby and spotted camille sitting alone. He grabbed her hand and dragged her outside.

" James what are you-" But he pushed her into a cab and slid in next to her. " James what the hell?"

" I think I just made it worse." Camille crossed her arms at his statement.

" what do you mean by that?" she said narrowing her eyes. He sighed and explained the story.

" UGH. James were supposed to be splitting them up! Not bringing them closer!" She said exhasperated. He looked down.

" Im sorry it slipped." He said guilty.

" Well... I broke up with steve this morning..." She said softly. James starred at her.

" who knows maybe this will work. This whole getting them jelouse was stupid, they didn't do shit about getting us back." James stated. Camille nodded and they both sat and pondered there next move.

" so how do we start to split them up?" James said.

" We need to make them fight. The more they fight the more they'll look to someone else."

" Your right, and sooner or later they'll come back to us! Okay so whats the plan?" James stated excitedly.

Xxxxx

Rehersal had gone great today, and she was just ready to be back on the dance floor. She stretched her legs apart and pulled her body to the middle.

" Ouch that looks painful." Someone said behind her. She sat up quickly.

" What the fuck do you want?" She said viciouslly making him wince. Jame looked down as he leaned against the door frame.

" I broke up with her." Nikkis head whipped back around.

" You...what?" Her face softned. " ...why? To get back on my good graces." James sighed and walked over sitting next to her.

" No. Because she was wrong. And I was tierd of hearing her complain about every little fucking thing. What she had said today, literally opened my eyes to how truly disgusting she wouldn't even apologize to you. So I told her we were done." He said looking down.

" james...i-" But he shushed her placing a kiss on her cheek. She closed her eyes, basking in his sceant of nautica cologne.

" I have to go, but come over later. We can all watch a movie or something." She nodded and he left smiling to himself.

Xxxx

Nikki walked over to the guys and handed them the popcorn. She plopped down next to logan who smiled to her, wrapping his arm around her shoulders. James glarred daggers in there direction. Kendall and carlos started to read off names of movies from the on demand list when there was suddenly a knock at the door.

" who could that be?" Kendall asked. James jumped up and smiled.

" I invited camille. Her and steve broke up so I figured she'd need some friends." He said opening the door. Logan and nikkis eyes widened.

" Wait what? They broke up?" Logan said sounding a little to hopefull. Nikki slapped his chest and he made a face at her. Camille walked in wearing a cute pair of pjs. She sat right in between james and logan, making logan shift uncomfortably.

" So what movie we watching guys?" Camille said happily.

" We have yet to decide," James said relaxing into the couch. " any suggestions?" He said with a flirty smile. Logan and nikki eyed them.

" Uhm, we could watch the notebook!" She said excitedly. Everyone groaned.

" NO CHICK FLICKS." they all said in unison. Camille frowned.

" How about nightmare on elm?" Carlos suggested. Nikki and camille made a face.

" Okay how about titanic!" Nikki said smiling.

" YEAH!" Camille exclaimed clapping her hands together.

" Do we have to? Is it a chick flick?" Kendall said whinely.

" Not even. Its all action!" Camille said with a wink.

" fine." The boys said sadly.

Xxxx

" WHY DID SHE LET GO! THERE SO WAS SO MUCH ROOM ON THAT DOOR!" Carlos cried rocking back and forth.

" She SHOULDN'T HAVE LET GO!" Kendall sobbed quietly into carloses shoulder. Nikki rested her head on logans shoulder. Camille noticed and rested her head on james who looked confused but quickly caught on. Logan turned and saw his friend and camille snuggled up. He clutched his fist into the popcorn. Furious he stood up quickly pushing nikki off of him.

" What the hell!" She yelled rubbing her head and eyeing him.

" Im going to bed." He said frowning. Everyone watched him.

" Whats up his butt?" James said curious. Nikki starred at him.

" How am I supposed to know?" She said standing up and grabbing her stuff angrily walking back to her appartment.

Xx

" Its working!" James said excitedly as he walked camille back to her room. She smiled.

" I know, who knew me just putting my head on your chest would set them off like that." She said a little shocked. " Welp goodnight james see you tomorrow." She said as she closed the door and james walked back to 2J.

Suddenly it hit him, this was his best friend. The same guy who helped him pass all those tests, took care of him when he was sick, defend him when he was in trouble. But then again, he loved nikki. It was a feeling so passionate, so rich that it killed him to see her with anyone but him. Those eyes, there peicing gree color, and that beautiful black hair. And those tattoos, he recently became extremely attracted to body art, and hers was flawless. It fit her every curve, and oh how beautiful and percise those curves were. And when she spoke, he was constantly in a state of awe, at the way he said her name, or the way she laughed he felt butterflies in his stomach.

" James, are you okay?" James jumped at the sound of someone behind him. He had been litterally staring at the door of 2J for about 5 minutes. He turned to face nikki. He gulped visibly and she crossed her arms.

" I..Uh...I was just...Yup." He said slowly opening the door.

" are you sure? You were standing in front of the door for like 5 minutes. It looked like you were thinking about something." She said slightly concerned. He paled.

" What? No. I was just admiring the carpentry of this here...doorrrrrframeeeeethingy." He said stroking the wood. She scrunched her eyes and nose in confusion and he instantly smiled.

" What?" She said looking away , her cheeks slightly rosie.

" Nothing its just...You do this cute thing with your nose when your confused." he said gesturing to his own. She bit her lip and looked away.

" Is logan in there?" She asked quietly. James heart sank and he sighed.

" Uh, yeah." He pushed open the door so she could walk in. His eyes never leaving her backside, completely off gaurd he suddenly fell flat on his face tripping over sidetable leg. Nikki gasped and spun around ,the boys all rushed inside to see what happened. James cursed and hit the floor with his fist. " SON OF A BITCH." He yelled grabbing his nose. He could feel the warm liquid trail down his lips and then down his chin.

" OH my god hes bleeding! Logan grab your first aid, guys help me get him up." He was a little dizzy as they sat him on the chair. He grabbed his nose attempting to stop the bleeding. Nikki pulled up a chair in front of him.

" NO!" she yelled as he rolled his head back. " Your going to swallow your own blood and choke." She said grabbing the tissue away from him that he had put on before. She pulled out gauze from the first aid kit and pressed it on his nose. He winced. " sorry." She said softly. " here hold this for a second." she then walked over to the sink and wet a couple of pieces bringing it back to him and sticking some up his nostrils. She laughed a bit.

" Oh whats so funny?" He said twisting them around to become more comfortable.

" Nothing, but with the way your bleeding itd be easier sticking my tampons up your nose." His eyes widened. " IM KIDDING!" She said shaking her head with a laugh. " jeeze your touchy all of a sudden." He sighed and looked down.

" sorry." He muttered.

" Its okay hun, soo..." She trailed off. He looked up at her twisting his mouth in awkwardness.

" Sooo...?"

" did you forget there was a table there?" She giggled trying to cover her laugh. He narrowed his eyes and fake laughed then rolled them in response.

" Ha Ha No, I just...you know..."

" no I don't actually."

" I was preoccupied." he snapped. She mouthed and oh and smiled wickedly.

" With whatttt?"

" Nothing."

" tell me."

" No nikki drop it." He said grabbing the rag she was cleaning his face with. He growled as he walked back into his room, slamming the door. Nikki turned to the other boys. They all shrugged. Nikki inhaled deeply and handed kendall some bandages and gauze.

" He cut his lip too, so if it starts to bleed again put a piece of white bread on it and then-" She started, kendall looked up raising his eyebrows.

" White bread?" He said cautiously.

" Yes. I promise, its an old family trick. Just do it. And change the guaze every half hour till it stops. Im going to bed." she said sourly jumping off the chair and walking back to her room slightly distraught. What could james have possibly been so distracted by to make him fall like that?


	11. Chapter 11

_HELLO THERE MY LOVES3 Litterally Ive been meaning to write you guys to tell you how much I love each and every one of you. Ive been writing Fan fiction for years but I never had urge or want to finish any. But this fandom MAKES me want to keep going, You guys make me want to keep going. Your reviews and subscribes litterally put a smile on my face everyday and make me want to sit here and write. I love to write, and ive never finished a fan fic so I plan to make this my first one to be finished :3 AND there will be a sequal but im getting ahead of myself. SO, warning ;) get tissues, this one is going to be emotional as fuck. Im sorry, ive been in such a rare mood and I keep wanting to angst shit up. Don't worry, it gets worse before its gets better ;) So here you are my loves. A SUPER LONG EMOTIONALLY CRIPLING CHAPTER. Enjoy :3_

It was opening night, nikki had been sick to her stomach with nerves and kept inhaling and exhaling attempting to breathe. She paced in front of her vanity mirror, biting her lip. She stopped and looked into her reflection. Behind the blonde wig and red lips she could see her anxiety flaring. There was a knock at her door and she froze.

" Hey you!" She heard a familiar voice and smiled. She whipped around and smiled as logan squeezed in quickly. He walked up to her and eyed her up and down.

" So What do you think?" She said laughing a bit and spinning around. He shrugged and smiled.

" You look...amazing. So different seeing you with blonde hair though." He said touching her wig. She smirked.

" No shit." She said sighing.

" Whats wrong?" He asked as she turned away and fidgetted with her fingers.

" I can't do this." she whispered turning around tears in her eye. " You were wrong." She shook her head vigorously. He put his hands on her shoulders making her breathe deeply.

" Nikki. Your going to be amazing." He said placing his lips on her forehead. " I know for a fact,you never cease to amaze me." He pulled away smiling smally. " I gotta go, Ill see you out there." He said shutting the door.

Xxx

As soon as she hit the stage, she regained composure and was able to perform amazingly. Her last scene was up, and her nerves had long but faded after receiving 3 standing ovations. She slowly made her way to the stage in her silver evening gown. The spotlight flickered on. Her eyes grazed the audience searching for logans face. Instead her vision fell onto a familiar brunette who was smiling up at her. She was surprised to see james here, he had stopped talking to her a couple of weeks ago after that night he fell. He startd to hang out with camille a lot, and only acknowledged her with a hi or a smile. It was actually driving her up the wall. It was her job to ignore him not the other way around. Her and logan had been distant as well, making her twice as unsure about what they were doing. She loved logan, and faking this relationship thing was fun, but she felt like they were forgetting why they were doing it. Logan started to also hang out with camille a lot, and ever since camille broke up with steve shes been hanging around the boys more and more. Don't get her wrong she loved camille she was one of her best friends, but this whole game she was playing between james and logan was starting to piss nikki off. She couldn't have them both. And Nikki would undoughtably fight her for james. And for some reason, she didn't understand why. And it scared her. Pushing that aside she relaxed a closed her eyes as she began to sing her finale.

_They thought they could dispose of me_

_They tried to make me small_

_I suffered each indignity_

_But now rise above it all_

_Yes, the price I paid was all I had_

_But at last, I found release_

_And if something good can come from bad_

_The past can rest in peace_

_Oh if you see someone's hurt_

_And in need of a hand_

_Don't forget me_

_Or hear a melody crying from some baby grand_

_You don't forget me_

A tear escaped her eye as she stared up into the light, it was just her , the stage, and the spotlight.

_When you sing happy birthday to someone you love_

_Or see diamonds you wish were all free_

_Please say that you won't;_

_I pray that you don't forget me_

_But forget every man who I ever met_

_'Cause they only lived to control_

_For a kiss they paid a thousand_

_Yet they paid fifty cents for my soul_

_They took their piece_

_The price of fame that no one can repay_

_Ah, but they didn't buy me when they bought my name_

_And that is why I pray_

_That when you see someone's hurt_

_And in need of a hand_

_You don't forget me_

_Or hear a melody crying from some baby grand_

_You don't forget me_

_When you sing happy birthday to someone you love_

_Or see diamonds you wish were all free_

_Please say that you won't;_

_I pray that you don't forget me_

_There are some in this world who have strength on their own_

_Never broken or in need of repair_

_But there are some born to shine who can't do it alone_

_So protect them and take special care_

_Take care_

_And don't forget me_

_Please take care_

_And don't forget me_

_When you look to the heavens with someone you love_

_And a light shining bright from afar_

_Hope you see my face there_

_And then offer a prayer_

_And please let me be_

_Let me be that star_

Her voice echoed into the silence of the room. Suddenly she heard people stand up and clap victoriously. She let out a breath she didn't realize she was holding and smiled a bit as the light faded. When the lights lit up once more, she bowed and smiled, tears in her eyes. Her eyes landed on the boys who were howling from front row. She waved to them and laughed a bit. She then noticed james was no longer with them. Her smile faded a bit, but she replaced it with a fake one. She walked off stage and held back this pang that surged through her heart. She ran past people who congradulated and she thanked them, sort of in a daze she entered her dressing room. Slamming the door shut she fell against the door and slid down.

" jeeze, you look like hell." Someone said from her couch. She jumped and saw james starring at her oddly. He had a boque of lilys. Her favorite flowers.

" Yeah, im just...stressed." She said softly standing up, griping the door knob for support. He gave her a sincere half smile and held out the flowers. He stood up and walked over to her. She began taking her make up off in the mirror, attempting to not make eye contact with him. But as he came up behind her and helped her take off Marilyns jewlery, the touch of his skin made shiver.

" sorry, are my hands cold?" he said concerned watching her eyes open in the reflection. She shook her head quickly with a smile.

" No just nerves leaving the body is all." She said. He smiled and nodded.

" You did a phenomanal job tonight." he said . She smiled to him.

" Really?"

" No one has ever really made me cry before, in a good way of course." He laughed. She giggled and nodded.

" Okay. Then I feel accomplished." She said with a smirk. He nodded with a laugh starring into her eyes through the mirror. They were so beautiful, so pure. The most vibrant emerald hes ever seen. They were mesmorizing. She wiped the rest of her make up off and pulled off her wig. Without realizing what he was doing, he pulled out the pin in her hair, letting it fall messly around her face and down her back. He gulped, every inch of his body ached to be pressed against hers. To here that voice cry his name in pleasure.

" James?" He shook his head , coming back into reality. Simply smiling he put his hands on her shoulders and leaned down next to her ear.

" Has anyone ever told you how breathtaking you look without any make up on?" His hott breath carressed her ear and neck, making her eyes close once more. His sceant lingered around her, and she bit her tounge attempting to stop the fact that every nerve in her body was vibrating making her want to just rip every layer of clothing off of him.

" Hey nikki the guys and I are ready to take you out to din-" Nikki and james both spun around to see logan and camille standing there. Nikki quickly put on a fake smile, cursing in her head loudly about how logans timing fucking sucked. " Sorry were we interrupting something?" He said slyly. Nikki walked over to him and placed a kiss on his lips quickly before walking out of the room, tears starting to stream down her cheeks once more. " Nikki!" But she ignored logans calls and just kept walking.

Xx

Nikki took a lap around backstage, then walked back to her room. She had been gone about 20 minutes, her face red from rubbing it and the headache that was brewing became more and more with each step. Everything but what was in her mind was a blur, moving like a ghost in between people.

She opened the door to her dressing room, all 4 boys, camille and lucy sat on the couchs. They're heads all snapped in her direction and she smiled.

" Nikki, where the hell did you go? I was calling after you." Logan snapped standing up. She narrowed her eyes. That tone, she didn't like it so much. It wasn't normal.

" I had to make rounds, sorry I didn't hear you over everyone." She gave him an odd look .

" Whatever are you ready to go?" He said crossing his arms.

" depends, are you going to leave the bitchy attitude here?" She spat. Looking taken aback, he nodded and everyone else eyed her. " good." She said grabbing her coat, pulling her hair back in a messy bun and walked out of the dressing room, a bounce in her step. She hasn't walked tall in awhile, but she would not let a man ruin her stride. Her chin was up and she could feel everyones eyes on her. They walked over to the black escalades and split up. Logan, took a car with camille and carlos, being that he knew getting in a car with Nikki would earn him a mouth full. James slid in next to her and she merrily looked out the window. The drive to the restaurat was a long and awkward one. Being stuck in LA traffic was twice as bad.

" How are you?" James asked quietly. She turned to him and scrunched her face in confusion.

" Im fine why?" He shrugged.

" I don't know you seem really... upset." He trailed off.

" Im not. IM fine." She said sighing and turning back to the window. Suddenly she felt his hand land on hers and squeeze it reassuringly. But instead of pulling away she intertwined her fingers in his and squeezed back. His skin was irratatingly soft, and the touch made her relax in seconds.

Xxx

Nikki was once again stratigically placed in between logan and james. But what she disliked, was camille was on logans other side, flirting abnormally. She knew this thing with logan was extremely temporary, but it still bothered her that someone would attempt to break up there relationship whether it was fake or not. Camilles hand would land on logans every once in awhile and nikki would shift uncomfortably. The night went on, and nikki felt almost completely ignored by logan. Worst part was, he was flirting back. She gripped her wine glass as camille laughed about something and whispered in logans ear. Suddenly the glass shattered into her fingers. She gasped and dropped the shards of glass. Everyone else yelped and starred at her.

" sorry, I must have been gripping it to hard." She said hailing a waitor. He came over and cleaned up the mess and braught her another glass.

" are you sure your okay?" James asked leaning over to her. She gritted her teeth with a smile and nodded. He sighed and they all went back to eating.

" james?" someone said from across the table. Everyones eyes darted up to see, a brunette girl who was smiling wildly. Nikki would've thought It was a fan at first.

" Penny?" He said in shock. All the guys stood up and hugged her. Apparently they knew her.

" How are you boys?" He pipped in her northern british accent. If things couldn't get worse, she kissed james right on the lips. Nikki choked on her wine . " Ive missed you dearly."

" we're great." James said after regaining composure. " what uhm, what are you doing here?"

" ah, secret business, but I will be in LA for awhile. Fathers doing some project here so. But anyway , who might these girls be?" She said with her sweetly sickening voice.

" This is our friend camille, lucy and Nikki. Nikki's dating logan." James announced, taking charge. Nikki raised her hand to penny and smiled with a challenge.

" Pleasure." Nikki announced.

" Join us?" James said pulling out the vacant seat next to him. Penny nodded with a sincere smile and sat. she had never heard james talk like that to ….anyone before. Like he was dazed and amazed by this girl. Big deal she was british. I mean she seemed nice, but that ' innocent' kiss was a declaration of war.

The rest of the night, nikki was univitably ignored by everyone. By the time she was done with her 5th glass of wine, she got up stumbling a bit. No one would notice her leaving, they were all to caught up in each other and the new chick. She slowly swayed to the door, pushing it open. She looked around sighed.

" Heading back home Ms. Sivini?" Paul the boys driver asked. She smiled to him and shook her head.

" Nah , im going to go on a walk. Thanks though." She said slowly making her way down the street. She was a bit wobbly, and overly tipsy. She leaned against walls to save her balance. About a half later, she was in a suburban area, unknown. She saw a large stone building, and a graveyard ahead. Opening the gate she walked slowly in and headed to the lighted church doors. It was quite a beautiful church, hand crafted stone work, staind glass windows that glowed even though there was no sun. She traced her fingers over the pews, The front alter was decked out in beautifully lit candles. She smiled softly. Her phone began to buzz once more, that was about 20 times now since she had left. She figured she'd call them but first shed make them wonder. She walked down the red carpeted isle. Closing her eyes , letting the alcohol take over. She slowly danced to the front.

" I have to say in all my years here, i've never seen one person dance to the front of a church." Someone said behind her. She jumped and spun around coming face to face with an elderly women. She was smiling warmly and eyed nikki.

" I..Im sorry I was just-" The women waved off nikkis apology and motioned her to sit on the front pew next to her. Nikki reluctantly sat down.

" So my dear, why are you here today?" The women asked with a smile. Nikki smiled back and shrugged.

" I was just walking past. I figured id come in. I love the art in this church, its breathtaking." Nikki said glancing around once more.

" Yes, it is isn't it? Have you ever been to church?"

" When I was younger I would go, but my parents started to fight a lot. So we stopped going when I was around 13-14." She trailed off slightly embarrased.

" You know, you should never feel judged in gods house my dear. He invites us in for a reason." The elderly women said warmly, patting nikkis hands. She got up and started to walk back down the isle and turned around. " If you should ever feel like you need someone, hes always listening. Remember that and next time you won't feel so alone. I did, when my husband died, I felt like I was the only person on earth. But I came to church and just sat here. As rediculous as it sounds, I felt his presence instantly." She finished with a wave and walked out the double wooden doors leaving nikki alone in her thoughts. She was never religious but she was alone right now. Sighing she got up shakely and turned away , walking to the exit. She could feel something in the pit of her stomach , but she brushed it off on the amount of alcohol she consummed tonight.

Xxx

The headache that began when she was a mile away from the palm woods was twice as bad when she walked into the vacant lobby. She was still very intoxicated and wobbly on her feet. She dragged herself to the elevator and hit the up button, rubbbing her temples. When she arrived on the second floor, she grudgingly pulled herself to her appartment.

" Camille, this is wrong." She heard someone say from around the cornor. She may have been drunk but she was coherent. She peeked over to see logan and camille , logans back against the wall. " Camille I can't-" What happened next was in slow motion. She watched camille press her lips to logans, and nikkis heart split. She gasped and covered her mouth with her hands. Tears began to fall immediately. What she did next was a blur, she simply walked up to a shocked logan and slammed him hard in the face.

" Fuck you." Was all she said as she ran down the hall. Suddenly someones arms caught her and she struggled to get free.

" Nikki! NICOLE CALM DOWN! NIKKI!" She could make out james voice but she squirmed free. By this time the boys , lucy and penny emerged from the room. Logan and camille walked up to them as well. " What the hell is going on?" James demanded starring at everyone. Nikki turned her head away.

" I...kissed camille." Logan said rubbing the back of his neck. Camille refused to look up from the ground.

" You...You what?" James asked in disbelief. He looked at nikki who was stood stone still. Her face was emotionless aside from the stream of tears that fell down her cheeks. Everyones eyes were on her. She slowly made her way up to logan and camille.

" I should tear both of your eyes out right now but then..how will you ever be able to look at yourselves in the morning." She said dangerously. She pushed passed them and walked back to her room. She ignored logan and james calls. She growled and kicked the door shut. There was way to emotions running through her tonight, and the alcohol was not helping. She crumbled onto the floor leaning her body against the back of her couch for support and hugging her knees to her chest.

Xxxx

James and logan knocked repeatedly on nikkis door, calling her name. James looked to logan.

" I should punch your fucking head in you know that? For a smart ass , your dumb as shit!" James yelled into logans face. Logan narrowed his eyes.

" It wasn't my fucking fault. Camille kissed me first!" He spat in his friends face. James hovered over him.

"How could you even think of kissing her back? Or maybe the whole flirting rediculously at dinner started her off!" He had never been so angry at anyone in his entire life. Fury was radiating from his body. " This is all your fault logan. I swear to god if anything happens to her-"

" OH LOOK WHO SUDDENLY GIVES A FUCK!" logan interrupted.

" I NEVER STOPPED CARING! BUT YOU APPARENTLY HAVE!"

" ME? ME? I WAS THE ONLY ONE WHO GAVE A SHIT ABOUT HER AFTER YOU DUMPED HER POOR ASS IN MIDDLE SCHOOL! DON'T BE SO THICK JAMES. YOU'RE NOTHING TO HER! ALL YOU CARE ABOUT IS YOURSELF. AND THANKS TO YOU I HAD TO KEEP GOING ON WITH THIS FAKE DATING THING! BECAUSE OF YOU I HAD TO HELP NIKKI TRY AND MAKE YOU JELOUSE SO YOU COULD FINALLY SEE HOW MUCH SHE FUCKING LOVES YOU! BUT NO! YOU HAVE TO A THICK HEADED FUCK AND RUIN IT ALL!" James froze in his spot. Kendall, carlos, camille and lucy's widened. Logan cursed under his breath. What had he just done? " Fuck me."

" you...you lied to me? Both of you?" james said in a hurt tone. " You knew how I felt about her. And she knew too and you...you both..." Logans featured softened. He looked down ashamed. " Someone go get a fucking keycard from bitters desk..." james looked to carlos who nodded and ran downstairs.

" if we didn't lie, you'd still be lying to yourself. You didn't care about her at first james, She was just a piece of ass to you in the beginning." Logan replied after 10 minutes. James looked up at him emotionless. Carlos ran up and placed the key card in James hand.

" I hope you know, I can never forgive you for this." James said calmly. Logan shivered at his tone, hed never seen james so upset. He was pale as if he had seen a ghost or was going to be sick to his stomach. He watched james slide the key card in and the two cautiously walked in, what there eyes landed on made there insides churn.


	12. Chapter 12

_Seriously, you guys. I don't think you know how fucknig awsome it feels when you get reviews and subscribers :3 I legit look forward to it 3 I love you guys so much :) So here you go le next chapter sorry it took so long . **gets stones thrown at her** HEY GUYS CHILL OR BE CHILL. Just kidding, I deserved those :c haha I usually hate cliffhangers as well so I FEEL U . I. FEEl. YOUR. PAIN. Kk here you go ;3 next chapter up sooonsssies :D_

If james was pale before, he was the walking dead now. He bent down next to nikki, sighing as she drunkily smiled at him. She held up an empty vodka bottle toward him and he could smell the alcohol off her entire body. She could barely keep her eyes open.

" Nikki, what did you do." He asked her softly lifting her up bridal style. She moaned and wrapped her arms around his neck. She was so frail in his arms, he tried not to break her. He saw logan try and come forward, but he stopped him , shaking his head. " don't even, you've done enough damage." he spat harshly. Logan frowned , and backed out closing the door behind him. James sighed and looked at the heavilly intoxicated girl in his arms. He walked into her bathroom standing her against the sink. He wiped her face with a wet cloth but she pushed his hand away.

" Noooo..." she trailed off shaking her head. He sighed.

" Nikki your make up is all over your face. You have to sober up come on." He said fighting her off. Her head lawled forward into his chest. He placed the rag on the back of her neck. " why?" was all he said before she wrapped her arms around his neck for support. He pulled her close his arms trailing down her back.

" cause he lefff me." She mumbled fresh tears coating her pale skin. James took a shaky breath.

" no, nikki he...he just... he just i-" Nikki shushed him by sobbing and falling back into his chest.

" w-why doesn't any-anyone l-love m-m-me?" James heart broke. He should have been pissed. He should've been throwing things, breaking shit. Logan and Nikki lied to him, and as much as he wanted to punch a wall, he had to take care of nikki. He had never seen a more broken girl.

" Shh, nikki... its okay. He loves you. Carlos loves you. Kendall loves you. Camille loves you...i love you." She looked up and wiped her face.

" I-I heard logan. W-Why aren't you mad at m-me?" She said trying to calm down. He sighed once more and shook his head.

" I am, but right now...You need someone. You need me." he said placing his lips on her forehead. " come on you need to shower." He says softly as she groans. " I know , im not exactly excited either. Believe me the first time I wanted to have you fully undressed is when your sober and willing." She giggled a bit. " so you find me funny? Good."

" l o l your cute..." She said slurring her words.

" Glad you think so- arms up." He said as she obeyed. " I feel like your babysitter or something-No stand." she giggled again and let him slip her dress off.

" y-you know you cou' jus' tear it off with your teeth." she responded with a wink. He smiled a bit. At least she wasn't crying. He could handle shitty jokes.

" sorry, It looked expensive-Underwear." he said not looking down. She sighed as he turned on the shower. He helped her in. The hott water penetrated her skin and she yelped backing up. James gaspd as she grabbed his shirt and she fell back. He slipped into the tub as she fell ontop of him.

" SHIT!" She said giggling. He sighed as he felt the hott water poured over him.

" Nikki...Why did you-" But he felt her lips press against his. The feeling that arose in his stomach soared through his body and his fingers. IT was like a fireworks show, and the adreniline of riding a thousand roller coasters. He was in shock .forgetting to kiss back. She pulled away looking into his eyes.

" thank you." she murmerd. But he leaned up not leaving her gaze. He tore off his shirt and chucked it with his pj pants outside the tub. She eyed him as he stood up pulling her up with him. His eyes didn't leave hers as he reached over and grabbed her shampoo. " did I do something wrong." He shook his head and ran his fingers through her hair, making sure every bit of alcohol and sweat was gone from her roots.

"n-No. Im just a little...caught off guard is all. And now you've got me In my boxers...in your shower." He said finally breaking the gaze. She looked down and leaned against him. " Okay rinse your hair." She did as she was told and he stared at her backside. Her curves were inviting, and he could feel himself get arroused. He quickly tried to shake it from his mind. She turned around and he caught sight of the rest of her beautiful physique. The perfect hour glass shape, her perfect c cup sized breasts and he could see her ruby red belly button ring. He bit his lip wantingly.

" Someones happy." She said teasingly with a drunken giggle. He jumped while returning to reality. He remember he was In nothing but boxers and they were completely see through. He cursed as She slowly made her way over to him .

" shush you." He said as she almost slipped again. He grabbed her, holding her up.

" I wanna sleeeep." She whined as james hauled her up against him, he began washing her with the luffa and that amazing body wash he was in love with. She rested peacefully In his arms as he dunked her under the shower head. She spit water out rubbing her eyes grudgingly.

" sorry, but you need to stay awake." he said with an apologetic tone. She attempted to slip from his hands and sink into the tub but he lifted her up once more. She placed her head on his chest and nuzzled into it. She was so beautiful, even when she was too drunk to comprehend anything. He smiled a bit turning off the water and lifting her out gently. He wrapped the towl around her and she smiled , her eyes not opening. " NIKKI!" He yelled. She jumped and narrowed her eyes slapping him in his chest. " Nik, you have to stay awake. Please." She relaxed as he placed her on the toilet so he could dry off a bit. He turned to see her leaning her head on the wall next to her and slipped off his boxers, wrapping a dry towel around himself. He shook his head , making his hair dry a bit. He walked over to nikki and lifted her up bridal style once more. He placed her on the bed and dressed her wordlessly, all the while taking in every bit of her beauty. He laid her back and pulled the covers over her. She cuddled into her pillow and he gave her a half smile. He walked into her living room and fell onto her couch relaxing into its large pillows. He closed his eyes and drifted to sleep.

xxxx

Nikki jolted awake , sitting straight up she grabbed her head and glanced at her body, how did she get home last night? Why was her hair wet? How did she get dressed? Then she remembered Logan and camille kissing. She ran back into her appartment and grabbed her stash of pinnle remembered hearing logan spilling the beans about there situation. The rest was darkness. She swung her legs over the bed and cautiously walked into her kitchen grabbing her forhead. Suddenly she heard something moving around in her living room, she grabbed a bat from behind her fridge and walked toward the couch. She peeked over and screamed loudly falling back. James fell off the couch and stood up quickly. Nikki fell onto her bum still screaming.

" SHHH NIKKI! ITS ME ITS JAMES!" he screamed holding up his hands . " WHERE THE HELL DID YOU GET A BAT?"

" WHY ARE YOU NAKED? WHY ARE YOU ON MY COUCH? WHY ARE YOU FUCKING NAKED ON MY EFFIN COUCH?" she yelled. He looked down and realized his towel fell and he cursed grabbing it and wrapping it around his waist. " FUCK. My head." She said grabbing it and laying down in pain. He walked over to her and helped her up.

" come on, ill make you breakfest." He said sitting her at the table. He grabbed his boxers from the bathroom and slipped them on. When he came back in she was resting her head on the cool table.

" why are you being so nice to me? I lied to you remember?" James sighed as he put a pot of coffee on and grabbed two bowls and fruit loops from the cubboard. He placed it in front of her. She lifted her head and pulled it close.

" Because...i was kinda planning to break you and logan up anyway, but he managed to do that all on his own." James said pouring milk and cereal in her bowl. She played with It while he took bite of his.

" What about Penny?" she said with a snotty tone. He glared at her.

" what about penny?" He said narrowing his eyes.

" You like her. I can see it." He sighed.

" Nikki-"

" James don't fucking lie to me." She said dropping the spoon and crossing her arms.

" We dated a while ago. Shes a friend from london. Just a friend."

" Yeah that kiss looked friendly-"

" So did yours last night." he retorted. Her eyes widened. Suddenly she realized what she had done last night. The shower, he undressed her, she kissed him. He told her he loved her. She starred at him In shock. " Yeah you think your shocked? You should've seen me last night." He said going back to his cereal.

" Did you..." He coughed on his cereal.

" what? No. no no no. No. Nope. Not even...okay I saw your you know.." he gestured to her boobs and she smiled a bit. " They were very nice. Very proportioned. Then I saw some of you know..." He then gestured to her ass area. She giggled and looked away. He laughed a bit. " I didn't touch though. I only looked I know I wasn't supposed to but I don't think you realize how fucking beautiful you are naked." he said casualy taking a bite of his cereal again.

" Dick. Were you …." He raised his eyebrows at her and swallowed.

" Naked? Nope. I had my boxers on, but you could still see everything. Which I caught you starring at last night." He said with a smirk.

"Fucknut." She said frowning a bit starting to eat her cereal.

" So what are you gonna do about logan." he asked with his mouth full. She sighed, dropping her spoon once more.

" We're obviously over. But I guess I have to apologize." She said sourly.

" Actually he should apologize to you. He cheated on you remember?"

" yeah but, I mean...I kinda slapped him in the face and told him id claw his eyes out...And camilles." she snorted.

" what?"

" Nothing, I just find it kinda funny...i never liked him like that and yet im jealous."

" maybe you envy him for being in a relationship and your...you know...not." James shrugged.

" I guess...i don't know. Ugh my head is fucking killing me." she said placing her forhead back on the table.

" here go lay on the couch Ill get you coffee and asprin." James said nodding towards the living room.

" Im not laying on that couch until its fully disinfectd." James smirked and she giggled and laid down. She could smell his cologne from last night on the cushines and she smiled a bit closing her eyes. She opened her eyes when james rounded the cornor with black coffee. She grabbed it and took the asprin.

" so, I have rehersal today. I called your boss and dance instructer told them you have a fever and are unable to come to your rehersals the next couple of days."She spit her coffee out and he jumped out of the way.

" JAMES! WHAT THE FUCK-"

" No. Nicole, your staying home and recovering. Seriously, last night you scared me and everyone else shitless. You can not drink like that anymore. Period. This pattern seems to be getting more and more frequent. Alcohol is not always the answer. Sleep is."

" But-" He sat down next to her grabbing both sides of her head.

" I may look dumb but im not stupid. I can see what addiction is. My dad had it . Im not going to loose another person to it. So for me, stay away from alcohol for awhile." He said sincerely. She starred into those beautiful green eyes and melted. How could she resist. She nodded and he placed a kiss on her forehead. " Ill be back later to check on you later." He said getting dressed and walked out the door. What an ass shes not addicted to anything. Sighing she flicked on he tv and laid down, resting her head back on the pillow that smelled just like him.

Xxxx

Nikki walked toward the elevator, her skin ached from falling asleep in the sun for 3 hours. She hit the up button and the doors opened. Suddenly she was face to face with him. Her so called ' Best Friend'.

" Nikki!" logan said shakely. " we should... talk." He said as she reluctantly stepped in. The doors closed. Logan hit a button and the elevator stalled.

" Logan what the hell-"

" NO! We have to talk. Listen, im sorry about last night. I don't know what came over me. I...I feel like a complete ass-"

" Yeah because you are one. If you didn't want to be in this fake agreement anymore you could've just told me-BUT NOOO you had to suck face with princess schitzo over there-"

" Don't call her that. Your best friends with her-"

" NO LOGAN! I WAS BEST FRIENDS WITH YOU! REMEMBER? OH WAIT YOU DON'T! YOUR TO BUSY CHEATING ON ME!" Nikki screamed hitting the open button , and rushing back to her appartment. Logan chased after her, but she slammed and locked her door solid. She could hear him knocking but flipped off the door.

" I HAVE A KEYCARD!" He screamed from behind the wood. He wouldn't dare she thought. She heard the bing of her door unlocked and ran over to shut it.

" Go TO HELL!" She said trying to force it shut but he was to strong and pushed it forward. He slammed it shut. As she stood up from ground glaring at him. " What do you want? WE'RE OVER REMEMBER?" She yelled walking away.

" I want to know your not mad at me." He said softly. She turned on her heal.

" Im not mad. Im super fucking ecstatic. This is what you wanted wasn't logan? To be with camille again? WELL GO FORTH AND DO WHAT YOU NEED TO EFFIN DO!" He narrowed his eyes at her.

" YOUR JOKING RIGHT? THIS IS WHAT WE BOTH WANTED! YOU HAVE JAMES NOW! THE PLAN WORKED!"

" BUT AT THE COST OF MAKING ME LOOK LIKE A FUCKING DEPRESSED ALCOHOLIC!" Logan stopped and starred at her.

" Nikki, maybe cause your acting like one." He said quietly. Her mouth gaped open.

" Excuse me?" She said fire in her eyes.

" I...Im just saying. Maybe you have a lot on your plate. Maybe you should tone it down like a lot. You're doin the play and your dance company I mean..."

" Your shitting me right? You're the one who told me I could do both-YOU'RE THE ONE WHO SAID I COULD HANDLE IT." She spat pointing her finger in his face. He swatted it away.

" You need to relax." He said grabbing her shoulders. " seriously, your scaring me with your stress. Why do you we've fought for the past couple of weeks."

" Yeah I couldn't be from you cheating on me and feeling guilty or anything." She said crossing her arms with a smirk. He sighed and rubbed the back of his neck.

" the only reason your so mad nikki, is because you wanted to break up with me. And because your scared of your feelings towards james. But if you want to be immature and let this take over your life, ruin your career. Then fucking go for it. But don't ask me to stand around and watch you basically kill yourself." He said sadly turning around and slamming the door making her jump. She wiped away her tears. He was right. She was killing herself. From the partying the alcohol, the two jobs and ...james. Shaking her head she sighed and headed to her bedroom.

Xxx

" Nikki?" Someone whispered in her ear. She groaned and turned over.

"goway." she muttered from under the blankets.

" You know if you don't wake up im coming under." James said softly with a smirk. She smiled a bit and pushed him away. " come onnn please?" She shook her head and looked up.

" James its like 1 am. Go home." He frowned at her and laid back. " YOUR HOME." He laughed a bit.

" I got locked out."

" By all 3 of your bandmates?"

" Kendalls at lucys, Carlos is out with Jennifer, and logans in there with camille." Her head shot up. " Yeah now I got your attention. They've been in there for about 2 hours."

" So what the fuck do you want me to do about it?" He shrugged and cuddled closer to her. She narrowed her eyes and realized what he was trying to do.

" OH NO. NOPE. OUT NOW!" She said jumping up. She pulled the covers over her as she realized she was in her bra and underwear. She pointed to the door. " OUT! GO AWAY ASSHOLE!" He smirked.

" You know , ive seen everything already might as well sleep naked-" She threw a pillow at him and put on a fake frown. " RUDE."

" JAMES OUT. IM TIRED. I WANT SLEEP." He patted the bed next to him and she narrowed her eyes at him. " ALONE."

" I can't leave im locked out remember."

" FINE. COUCH." He sighed and got up.

" I just wanted to cuddle." He said frowning again. She sighed and shook her head.

" Couch."

" Fine." He said sticking out his tongue like a 5 year old. She smiled a bit and rolled into bed. After 5 minutes she cursed under her breath, kicking off the covers and walking into the living room. She crossed her arms and watched james toss and turn.

" Fine you big baby. STAY ON YOUR SIDE OF THE BED. I SWEAR IF I FEEL YOUR HAND ANYWHERE NEAR ME..i will chop off your dick and park it in your ass." He squealed and jumped up tearing off his shirt. She sighed. " Shirt on- AND PANTS!" She yelled as he made to take off his pants. He made a face and jumped next to her. She shut the lights and immediately heard him start to snore softly. She turned on her side and watched him peacefully rest. She smiled a bit. He really wasn't THAT bad of a guy she figured. She watched his chest rise and fall, he was so cute when he slept-WAIT. What was she saying? No. he was not going to do this to her AGAIN. This happened in middle school. She was way to fascinated by someone who wouldn't even double take her. She examined him carefully, he had the most beautiful sillohuete. His lips were so perfect, the were lightly tinted red as if he had been kissing someone. His eyes were hypnotizing when open, a worldwind of green , blue and some brown. Those muscles, they were a tease, especially when they tensed up when he hugged you. And that hair, god, it took everything in her power to not grab ahold of it and- Okay she obviously needed sleep. These were way to many feelings right now. She closed her eyes and slowly drifted back to sleep.


	13. Chapter 13

The next couple of weeks were weird for nikki, james seemed to want to spend most of his time with her. She didn't mind so much when he'd pick her up from rehersal or whatever, but still it was kinda weird being friends with him again. She missed logan, but he was with camille now and she had no choice, as james would show up at her door whenever she was home. James picked her up today, being it was around 2pm and people were on break for lunch. He took her to a small cafe around the cornor from her theater.

" So hows work so far?" He said quietly chewing on a piece of his bagel and cream cheese. She shrugged and smiled a bit.

" Okay, its just stressful cause I have play and I got a solo from my instructer the other day." She said sipping her coke.

" AH! No way nikki thats great! Congrats!" he said leaning over and giving her a kiss on the cheek. She laughed.

" Yay for more work!" She yelled sarcastically. He frowned a bit.

" So you don't want the solo?"

" No I do I just... I don't know. Im just so stressed out and -Im sorry but theres cameras in those bushes over there." She said pointing behind the potted plant. James scrunched his face and saw the papparazii expose themselves from there shitty hiding job.

" Just papparazi ignore them-Continue." He said taking another bite.

" Since when do you have papparazi?" She said crossing her arms.

" Since...you and logan broke up and now hes dating camille." James said not making eye contact.

" Yeah but what does that have to do with..." She narrowed her eyes at him.

" Yeah. I guess I should show you now before someone else does." He pulled out magazine from his backpack and handed it to her. Her face was plastered on the front cover of People. She gasped and covered her mouth.

" Big time Break up and Effect?" She screamed. There was clear picture of her wasted from that night after her show, when she saw logan and camille flirting. She flipped through the pages till it came to the article. She read over the words,

"Logan Mitchell, one of the 4 singers of Big Time Rush , ex has come out on bottom as she stumbles down the bouluvard extremely tipsy and a bit to much to drink, Sources report she was depressed after logan broke up with her for his new love interest Camille. But without a double take, it seems Ms. Nikki Sivini has found a new love as well. Logans best friend and fellow bandmate James diamond." She broke off. She bit her lip and looked up at james who was frowing and playing with his food.

" How long has this been out?" She questioned.

" Hit stores yesterday-BUT don't worry cause kelly's working on it. Just ignore them for now, like I do." He whispered smiling a bit. She sighed and rubbed her head.

" I can not believe this shit is happening right now." She growled. James scooted his chair over and wrapped his arms around her. " Why can't things in life be normal for fucking once?"

" Because thats boring." He replied as she rested her head on his shoulder.

Xxx

Nikki walked into dance, exhausted and barely comprehensible. She tossed her bag on the floor and smiled as she strolled up next to her dance instructer who smiled to her warmly. Her teacher stopped stretching and turned her , placing her hands on nikkis shoulder.

" Nikki, are you alright?" She asked concerned. Nikki sighed.

" Yeah i've been just really stressed and stuff with rehersals and-"

" Nikki, nicole... my sweet girl. You need to be able to breathe inbetween everything you do. You can't keep doing this to yourself. Its not worth it." She whispered and picked up nikkis chin. " Nicole please listen. Im taking your solo away until your more stable-"

"BUT! NO-"

" No buts. Stretch and get ready for the group choreo." She said walking away leaving nikki to stand there and ponder what just happened.

Xxxx

" Derek! This DRESS IS FALLING OFF MY CHEST!"Nikki yelled from onstage, attempting to fix the bust. She was loosing weight. And fast. Probably because james talked her into those stupid walks every morning. It'll be fun he said. You'll loose weight he said. Yeah weight not her gorgeous tits. " DEREK!" She yelled again, her director stood under the arch chatting away with someone. She raised her hand over her eyes and attempted to make out the mystery person. She sighed and jumped off the stage walking up to him. She could see the sadness in his face. Something wasn't right. He looked to nikki and his expression immediately softned. Nikki paled. She new that look. She feared that look.

" Whats wrong." She demanded. He looked down rubbing his face.

" Nicole, your off the rest of the day. It seems..." he trailed off and swallowed a lump in his throat. " It seems one of your friends has been in some sort of car accident." Those words pentrated her ears and her skin turned ungodly shades of white. Tears rolled down her cheeks as she burst through the double doors by the stage. She hailed a taxi and sped to the hospital. She threw open the cab door by the emergency exit and ran through the sliding doors. Her eyes landed on a bawling Mrs. Knight and katie. Kendall was pale, holding lucy close who was sobbing into his chest. Logan and camille huddle in a cornor as she covered her mouth and her body racked with pain. Carlos stood still next to jennifer who was gripping him tightly. Where was james. There eyes landed on her and she stood still. She shook her head.

" Where is he." She demanded as she walked past them. Kendall went to grab her but she pushed him off.

" Nikki hes in the room-they said we can't go in yet!" Logan screamed trying to contain her. She forced herself away from him and pulled off her heels. Where was he. Where were those green eyes. And that smile she looked forward to everyday. She could hear mama knight let out a cry as the boys tried to grab hold of nikki. She ran down the hall as they called after her. She could hear them running behind her but, nothing not even the pope could stop her in her tracks. She didn't know where she was going, but she had an instinct. Suddenly she was the end of the hall and shot right. She then ran headfirst into a doctor who starred at her oddly.

" Are you with James diamonds family." She nodded wordlessly and he sighed. "He can have vistors-" She pushed passed him and ran into the room. She gasped and grabbed onto a cart for support. She heard everyone walk in after her and she held her heart, attempting to control its rapid increase. She blocked out the rest of the world as she examined a frail broken man in front of her. This wasn't her james. This was a broken shell. He laid there silently, his eyes roaming around the room. She heard the doctor explain to the boys and Mama knight of his condition. Nikki ignored him and slowly slipped her hand into james. It was cold. His beautiful sunkissed skin was covered in gashes inches deep and the face she once dispised was littered with black and blues. He smiled a bit at her. She sat down on the chair next to him and her eyes never left his gaze. He squeezed her hand.

" You look beautiful." he said horasly. She didn't move, didn't smile but took in everything around her. She heard people head over to his bed and talk to him all the while just sitting there. He didn't mind, she would show emotion when need be. Apparently james was okay, just needed to be monitored and was just really banged up. He had to get over 200 stiches along his leg where it was gashed open and a couple on his head. Nikki's hand was still intertwined with his as he hugged and talked to everyone. Logan placed his hand on nikki's shoulder but she brushed it off. Mama knight and katie left to get james a few things from home, and everyone else stayed behind.

" Nikki...are you okay?" carlos asked behind her. She nodded silently.

" Nicole you are not. You practically punched logan and me just to get james room." Kendall announced crossing his arms. James looked at her in shock. She shrugged, holding back every emotion that was threatening to explode from must've noticed how uncomfortable she looked.

" Nikki...its okay to cry." James said softly. " You were scared. Its okay to be upset you know." She looked down refusing to make eye contact.

" why?" She asked softly. James looked at her oddly.

" Why what?"

" Why did you get in a car accident?" She said looking up into his stare. Her eyes were bloodshot and intense.

" I got hit by a drunk driver." She mouthed an oh and nodded. He grabbed her hand.

" But im okay. See!" he said waving his arms around earning some laughs from everyone. " So why are you in your second outfit for the show?"

" Because I got pulled off stage by my director announcing one of my best friends just got into a servere car accident and was rushed to he ER in critical condition." She said tonelessly. James frowned.

" Oh im sorry." She bit her lip and shook her head..

" its okay,just rehersal."

" So hows dance ?" She looked down embarrased.

" I lost my solo." she said sadly.

" Im sorry, I wish you hadn't. You deserved it." He said reassuringly. She snorted.

" Do you know who hit you?" James was a bit taken aback by the change of subject.

" N-no, I think hes okay though why?" She shrugged .

" Just wondering. I think im going to get some water." She said still emotionless. Everyone starred at her nervously. After she left the room, he orderd kendall and logan to go after her. They obliged and slowly walked toward where she was headed. She once again had no set destination. Just wandering. Because staying in tthat room with him was too painful to bear anylonger. She passed a couple of wards with babys, and figured she was in the childrens center. She glanced into the nursery and smiled. Such beautiful babies, no cares in the world with all the love they need. She turned around and kept walking she found an empty hallway and glanced around.

She slid down against the wall and it hit her like a wrecking ball tearing down her walls. She covered her mouth and curled her knees up to her chest. Yeah right it was okay to cry but not in front of people you've shown strength to she thought. Especially the man you may be in love with it. This thought caused her body to shake with more sobs. She could feel her makeup melt off her eyes and into her hands. She was so blinded by tears and emotion she didn't notice someone lift her off the ground and wrap there arms around her shushing her quietly. First the logan thing, then the alcohol abuse, loosing her job and her mindset and now this? She could only handle so much. Someone rocked her back and forth as her legs gave way and they sank into the ground with her.

" Its okay nikki, shhh. You're okay." Logan said brushing her hair back. Kendall stood agains the wall, a couple of tears falling down his cheeks. He felt for her. A girl with nothing and gained so much just to loose it all again. She couldn't even cry in front of people she was so damaged. And james. He was more then enough damaged. By his exs, the stress from gustavo and the everlasting effort to try and impress nikki. Logan looked up at kendall, he could see logans heart break repeatedly for nikki. She was so lost. Kendall sank to the floor next to them. He curled ontop of nikki rubbing her back as she tensed with each one.

" He's okay nikki, shhh its gonna be alright." Logan hushed her. She lifted her head to look at him.

"w-whats h-happening t-to m-me?" She gasped out. He sighed and bit his lip.

" Nothing your okay."

" Y-your lying. W-why am I l-like this?" She persisted. Logan looked to kendall for some support but he just shrugged. Logan sighed and looking into her emerald eyes.

" I think you may be...depressed." He said softly wiping the tears off her face as more fell.

"w-what?"

" its not that big of a deal, but it leads to addiction and its caused by stress. Which you are under an excsessive amount of. From lying to james, from play rehersal, from dance, and now loosing your solo and james accident. I think your drinking because it makes you feel a home, otherwise you look so lost." he wiped the hair from her eyes and she took in his words. Depressed? How could she be depressed she had everything. She sniffled and made to stand up. Logan and kendall caught her as she unstabbly fell against a wall. Her body still shook with silent sobs, but to hell if she let james see her like this. She decided to go for a walk, kendall and logan following her. She walked into the cafe , kendall and logan trailing behind. She grabbed a water and sat down in a booth. The boys slid in next to her. She sighed.

" You know, you guys don't have to follow me everywhere." she said with a small smile.

" I beg to differ." Kendall said with a snort.

" besides, James orders." Logan said relaxing a bit. She sighed and fidgetted with her water. They decided to head back to james room after a bit. Nikki simply sat beside him, stroking his hand. After about an hour every started to leave, aside from logan kendall carlos and nikki. The three boys excused themselves for a second to get dinner and come back. James looked at nikki.

" Nikki. Please say something."james said softly. She took a shaky breath and looked up.

" I don't think ive ever been so scared in entire life." She announced , letting a couple tears fall.

" Why would you miss me, god forbid?" He said with a playful smirk. She looked up at him, and his heart melted. There was so much pain in her eyes. " Sorry." He said scooting over on his bed. She got up and slowly laid next to him. She rested her head on his shoulder and he wrapped his arm around her , pulling her close into him. She buried her face into him and gripped his waist. He stroked her hair peacefully. Soon he heard her soft and suddle snores and he refused to move. He saw kendall logan and carlos re-enter and he put his finger up to his lip with a smile. They're faces lit up and he winked.

" See, I told you she liked you." Logan said with a smirk. James smiled.

" Only took her some months." Kendall said taking a bite of his sandwhich and sitting in the vacant seat.

" You two make a cute couple." carlos replied pulling up a chair at the end of his bed.

" She looks so calm when she's asleep." Logan said as he sat down inbetween kendall and carlos. His eyes looking over nikki small physique.

" Yeah, especially from what we saw before." kendall announced shaking his head in disbelief.

" What happened before?" James asked curiously. Logan smacked kendall upside the head and he cursed under his breath rubbing the now sore spot.

" Nothing. Don't worry about it bro." Kendall said brushing it off.

" No tell me. Now."

" Fine, but you can't tell her that we said anything." Logan gave in. " She had a...meltdown." James eyes widened and he looked between logan and kendall.

" what do you mean by meltdown?" He asked concerned.

" She just couldn't stop crying." Kendall said sadly looking over at her. " logan thinks..shes..."

" Depressed." Logan finished.

" Depressed? Your kidding right? Shes always smiling and laughing-"

" and Drinking and snapping." logan interrupted him. James pursed his lips and looked down at her.

" How bad do you think it is?"

" We just need to help her. If we contain her alcohol and keep her busy she won't turn to it if she has an episode, instead she'll come to one of us. But we have to keep her focused on something like the play or dance." Logan said in a doctor tone. James nodded.

" that shouldn't be to hard."

"Thats what you think." He said rubbing the back of his neck. As much as logan wanted to believe she might get better quick, he knew what this meant. This meant a full on warfare of containing her addiction. The boys started to head out announcing they'd be back tomorrow early and james bid them goodnight. Soon it was just him and a sleeping nikki. Ever since he saw her that day she arrived at the palm woods, he just imagined what it would feel like to have her asleep in his arms, even though he was in a hospital bed hooked up to 20 different beeping machines. But he cherished it, and even though she was leaning on his sore side, he didn't care , letting her sleep was a good thing since she rarely did that anymore. He closed his eyes and relaxed, drifting into a peaceful sleep.


	14. Chapter 14

Nikki reluctantly left the next day to go back to rehersals. She had called in sick that night, for obvious reasons and couldn't take anymore days off. Leaving james was the last thing she wanted to do, especially with the condition he was in. But he begged her to go home and rest up for the performance that night. The boys had skipped rehersal and stayed with him so she wasn't too guilty.

James laid in bed, his body was heavy with pain and he could barely move his arms or hands. He told the guys they can visit him later and that he just wanted to rest a bit from all the sedatives they gave him. Suddenly he heard the door open and figured it was a nurse, but instead saw a familiar head of brunette hair. He smiled a bit.

"Oh my god james, I heard what happened and I just..." Penny said covering her mouth sadly. He shrugged as she made her way to his bedside, placing her hand on his.

" Im okay don't worry. Just a couple bumps and bruises." he said trying to lighten the mood. She smiled a bit and rubbed his arm.

" Listen james, I...i don't think ive been completely honest about why I came back." She said nervously fidgetting with her shirt.

" Oh?"

" Yes, you see...I transferred to The US Agencey because...well...I sort of really missed you." She leaned into him and pressed her lips to his sore ones. In shock he didn't react. She pulled back embarrased.

He looked over her shoulder to see logan standing in the doorway, shocked. His face was expressionless and all he could see is him shake his head and walk out quickly. Everything hurt so james was unable to get up and chase him. He cursed loudly and penny looked away.

" I know you don't feel the same way." Penny said biting her lip, james narrowed his eyes at her.

" Hows that?"

" I see the way you look at her." James sighed and rubbed his temples.

" Penny-"

" I should've known that you'd be taken or well...in love with someone."

" You don't-"

" Oh please james, I think she's the only one who doesn't see how much you love her. Im not stupid."

" You think?" He asks oddly. She shruggs and sighs.

" I was stupid for coming here. I should've just stayed in london. Ill transfer back next month." She said standing up slightly dishoveled. She headed out the door when he spotted nikki running in with a large smile. She ran right up to james and placed a kiss on his cheek, handing him some stuff she braught.

" I got you food. Real food. Not that hospital crap. Oh I brought you some magazines, your labtop your ipod some movies and I think thats it." She said checking her bag. He laughed and thanked her.

" Thanks babe," he said sitting up happily. She bit her lip.

" So whats penny doing here?" James paled a bit and laughed.

" Oh nothing just telling me she's leaving next month." He said waving it off. She nodded. The boys walked in with lucy and camille. Nikki smiled to them and began to play with her phone. James smiled to them and his eyes fell on logan. The darkness he saw in logan was something he'd never seen before or at least not since he was ' pretending' to date Nikki. James looke away worriedly.

" Hey guys can you do me a favor, can you grab me a slice of chocolate cake from the cafe? Maybe you guys can get dinner while your down there." They all starred at james questioningly. " Acutally logan can you wait with me?" Logan nodded as everyone including a confused nikki headed to the cafe. Logan sat next to james in the vacant chair. He sighed and rubbed his temples.

" You didn't tell her." Logan said refusing to look at james.

" It was a misunderstanding. She came back to LA to be with me. But I turned her down. It was a harmless kiss- I didn't even kiss back." he defended. He gasp and grabbed his side. " fuck, that hurts!" He screamed. Logan looked at him and lifted up his blanket.

" Shit james, you ripped your stiches out. Hang on," He said pressing the nurses button and then grabbing gauze from behind him and pressing it on james open wound. The nurses rushed in and took over patching him up as logan stood by helplessly. When they were done, logan sat back down and sighed. " Listen, im going to give you the benifet of the dought and you have to promise me that it won't happen again. I may not be dating her anymore and she may hate my guts, but that doesn't mean I don't love her. Because I do, shes like a sister to me, and if you hurt her. Ill fuckin kill you." He said softly James sighed.

" I don't plan on hurting her. At all." Just then nikki entered a smile on her face handing james a plate with cake. He smiled to her warmly taking it and placing it on the side table.

" I thought you wanted cake?" she said.

" Oh yeah, well I did but my stitches ripped so I can't have it until a little later. Thank you though." he sent her a wink.

Xxxxx

The next week, they released james home even though he was still in a servere amount of pain. Everyone sat in Mama knights mini van as james laid his head on nikki for rest. She smiled a bit ran her hand through his hair. He was still very black and blue, cut up and bruised.

" James the doctors said you need a lot of rest, but someone has to keep an eye on you. Would you like to rest on the couch during the day?" Mama knight asked softly. James moaned a bit and shook his head.

" I can take care of him for awhile ." Nikki pipped up. Everyone starred at her in shock.

" You can?" Kendall said.

" You will?" carlos asked surprised.

" Oh sweetheart I wouldn't want you to be burdened-"

" No honestly, im in my room 24/7 anyway. Plus I have a California King so he can stay over and everything." She said happily.

" What about rehersals?" Logan asked annoyed slightly.

" I have this week off." She said narrowing her eyes at him. He rolled his eyes at her and smiled.

" Alright if james says its okay." Mama Knight replies as they pull up to the palmwoods. " James?"

" Oh yeah, im okay with it." He says with a tierd smile. Nikki perks up and helps him out of the car, his arm wrapped around her neck. Luckily all those dance courses made her do gym time as well, so he wasn't as heavy as she thought hed be. They got the elevator after everyone starred at them curiously. James made to let go of nikki, but started to sink into the ground. Logan and Kendall grabbed him and helped him into the elevator. Nikki watched helplessly and looked away. Maybe it wasn't such a good idea to have him stay with her. What was she saying? Of course It was okay. But looking at him like this was going to deffinatly take its toll on her. They reached the second floor and the boys headed to Nikkis appartment down the hall. She slipped in the key card and they laid james on her bed. He relaxed and smiled. The boys stated they were going to get some of james things for the week and bring it in here. Nikki sat beside him and he took her hand.

" thank you." He whispered. She smiled a bit and leaned down kissing his forehead.

" Your always welcome here james you know that. So, would you like anything?" She said getting up and stretching.

" Yeah can I get a soda?" She smiled and nodded walking into the kitchen. She grabbed a coke and remembered he couldn't really hold it on his own. Shit. She searched through her drawers and found a straw. She popped it in, hmm inovative she thought. She walked back in and He sat up a bit, wincing at the movement. She put the soda down and helped him. He brushed it off. " I got it nikki, don't worry im not that fragile." She sighed.

" So stubrron." He laughed at her comment. " Here's a bedside table and if you need anything just let me-"

" Actually, can you help me take my shirt off? Its kinda hott in here and I usually sleep with it off." He smirked a bit and her smile faded a bit.

" Your...your shirt?" He nodded. "Yeah I mean I guess I can." She said as he lifted his arms slowly. She pulled off his white v-neck, reveiling all of his scars, stitches and bruises. He still had that mesmorizing 6 pack perfectly crafted, but it was littered with wounds. She tossed his shirt on the chair and looked away blushing. Shaking her head she handed him the remote. The boys walked in with james labtop and clothes, starring at the two weirdly. Logan smirked.

" And so it begins." He says aloudly.

" And so what begins?" Nikki retorted crossing her arms. Kendall snorted as carlos laughed.

" So begins james attempt at seducing you with his body." She blushed once more and opened her mouth.

" Oh please, my voice is enough to seduce her. Your just jealouse you've got cookies in your poutch." James winked. Logan glared at him.

" Fuck you." He said flipping him off with a smile. " See you later buddy, feel better okay?" He said clapping james lightly on the back. Carlos hugged him and kendall fist pounded him. They all left and soon nikki was standing there with an already preoccupied james on his macbook. She sighed and laid down on the otherside. She sprawled out and relaxed. James smiled at her and hit play on his itunes.

" Your body is a wonderland?" She said with a small smile. " Really james? Really?" He laughed.

" hey, this angle is the best angle in the world." He said with a smirk. She picked up a pillow and threw it at him. He slapped it away and stuck his tongue out at her. Her eyes never opened.

" Stick that back in your mouth before I take it and wrap it around your neck."

" Mmm, you're going to have to make me." he said deviously. She sat up narrowing her eyes at him.

" Challenge accepted." she winked back. She grabbed his labtop and walked to the other side of the room.

" NOPE! NOT THE LABTOP! GIVE IT BACK!" He said attempting to get up but failing miserabbly.

" Now lets see what we have on heree..." She said sneakly, She clicked open his privates folder and her mouth dropped. " Oh my god."

" No! NICOLE CLOSE IT IM SERI-FUCK!" He said trying to reach for it.

" You still have these?" She said turning the computer around to show him that she opened his Old Photos folder. 200 pictures of them as kids rolled up and down the screen. He smiled and suddenly she turned it again. " Whats sex tape a video of?" She asked sarcastically. He turned bright red and went to snatch it away once more but she turned on her heel. " Not even going to bother opening that-EW! GROSS! Nora had pancake nipples?" She announced and his eyes widened finally able to limp over to her pull it from her hands. He growled under his breath and laid back down angrily. " Oh please, go through mine if you want. I have nothing to hide." He pouted at her.

" You were not supposed to see that. And yes she did." Nikki burst out giggling and he couldn't help but smile. She sighed and jumped back on her bed scooting closer to him. He smiled a bit and she turned the labtop towards her, scrolling through his folders.

" Poetry?" Once again he paled. Fuck he thought.

" yeah thats just some old-" But her eyes scanned over the words and he noticed her features soften.

" The only way to vent the soul,

are through words that can never be known

And words that fail to comprhend

What I truly feel." She said looked up at him he looked away , flushed with embarrasement.

" James this is beautiful." he looked at her surprised.

" it is?"

" Why don't you write music?" He shrugged.

" I don't know. I mean Gustavo writes everything so I figured you know..." shook his bangs from his face, like he seemes to do when hes nervous and nikki smiled a bit.

" I think you should show him." She said confidently, turning the computer back to him. He nodded, noting to do that when he got better. " so gotta ask about that ….sex tape" She laughed nervously. He inhaled sharply wincing at the pain.

" Noras idea, she thought it would be fun, but it was actually kinda annoying." Nikki made an o with her mouth in understanding. " Yeah so your turn." He said leaning over her and grabbing her macbook. She made to protest but allowed him to take it. He scrolled through some of her folders and came across ' artwork'. Her face fell.

" No don't-" But he opened to reveal some photographs she had taken for a photo magazine. His jaw dropped.

" Oh my god." She paled and covered her face. " You have perfect nipples." He said with a smirk. She pushed him playfully.

" Asshole. Close it."

" no no no, You got to see mine I get to see yours." He scrolled some more. He clicked on home videos and saw some of them when they were younger. He smiled to himself, and scrolled a bit further. He suddenly spotted a video of her when she was about 15. She had looked completely different. He made to click play but she quickly grabbed it from him and hit delete. He looked at her in protest. " Rude, I was going to watch that-"

" I didn't watch your ' Sex Tape'"

" I didn't say you couldn't." he said slyly, turning the computer to her. She looked away dramatically.

" Ew. Never."

" Oh please, if you had the chance im sure you would've made a sex tape with me too." he said matter of factly. She shot him a look.

" No acutally, I wouldn't. Just because we're friends doesn't mean im ever going to fall for you again." She said getting up heading to the living room, " That was a mistake I made one to many times." He frowned as she proceeded inside angrily. That was harsh she knew it but if pretending to hate him got her to stop with these feelings, then so be it.


	15. Chapter 15

Nikki walked through the lobby, and up to her appartment after an early morning run. She needed this past week has killed her. She had taken care of james and he was one hell of a whiney pain in the ass healthy. She didn't realize he'd be twice as bad sick. But she didn't mind. He was walking and today he was getting his stiches out. She walked into her appartment and headed into the kitchen. She turned the cornor to see james naked standing in her room. Her eyes landed on his bottom half and she screamed, closing her eyes.

" SHIT SHIT SHIT! IM SORRY!" She said closing her eyes and facing her back to him. He laughed.

" Trust me, i've seen you naked. It was only a matter of time." She could tell by his cocky tone, that he probably knew she'd walk in any second. "Seriously nikki, You can turn around we've been sleeping in the same bed for like a week."

" Yeah but that was because I was taking care of you AND you were clothed. So if you don't mind." He sighed.

" Fine I have boxers on." she turned around relieved.

" Not funny. Keep yourself clothed."

" Or you'll what?"

" I don't know but ill make sure you wont be able to reproduce for awhile." From her previous track record, he chose to be cautious.

" Cute bra, You always run around like that?" He said with some sarcashm.

" Yeah , so does every other girl in LA. But a least mine covers all of my nipples, unlike some." He laughed.

" Touche. So when should we go? I need to get this crap out of me." He said gesturing to his stiches. She made a face.

" gross, don't play with it. Id say an hour im just going to shower really quick, do my makeup and hair-"

" Don't do your hair today. I like it when it drys naturally. I miss your curls." She eyed him suspiciously.

" really?"

" Yes really." She shrugged.

" Okay natural it is." She said walking into the bathroom and hopping into the shower. He could hear from behind the door, singing She's No You by jess mccartney and he smiled to himself.

" You got that right Nikki, Nora is deffinatly not you." He whispered getting dressed carefully.

Xxxx

Nikki helped james to the car as he limped a bit into the elevator. The boys had gone to rehersals, And Gustavo gave james the week off, obviously, but he just wanted to go back. Being inside all week killed him. Hes an outdoor kind of guy so cabin fever was very prone, especially within the first 2 days. He quickly shuffled into the car gustavo gave him and they headed to the hospital.

After about 20 minutes in the waiting room, they were taken to a private room. James fidgetted with his fingers as nikki starred at him intently.

" Are you okay?" She asked .

" Yeah I just...really hate needles. And I don't like hospitals. They give me the skeeveys." She smiled a bit and placed her hand on his. He visibly relaxed.

" Its okay. Ill hold your hand if you need me too." she said slightly jokingly. He smiled a bit and nodded, intertwining his fingers in hers. The doctor came in and greeted them. He laid james back and took off his shirt. Nikki watched james shut his eyes tightly and she immediately felt bad for joking around. He was seriously scared. She tightened her grip on his hand and he inhaled sharply as the doctor started to pull out his staples and stiches. Nikki ran her other hand through his hair and he started to breathe normaly again. When the doctor was done he explained to take it easy and not go right into rehersal. James nodded probably not even listening, and grabbed nikkis hand almost running from the place. They arrived at the car and he leaned up to the driver, asking him something. He sat back and the car sped in the opposite direction of the Palm woods. Nikki hadn't noticed till she started to see the ocean and quickly turned to james.

" James where are we going?" She asked slowly. He smiled wildly.

" Surprise." He said as they pulled into the parking lot of a beach. Her mouth dropped and she starred at him.

" Hell no. Your not supposed to go in water for 24 hours!" She yelled as james winked and jumped out of the car running head first for the water. She cursed loudly and hopped out running after him.

" WOOOOOOOO!" He screamed tearing off his shirt. No one was around thankfully otherwise this would've been front page news.

" JAMES! GET BACK HERE NOW!" she yelled as he dove in popping up and smiling at her. She crossed her arms at him. " When you get back on shore im going to-" But he quickly ran up to her soaked and lifted her on his shoulder. She screamed and grabbed a hold of him for support.

" Your turn!" he said attempting to throw her in but she had a death grip on him. " Damn your light!" He said as he walked deeper into the water.

" JAMES! NO! PLEASE! IM SORRY I WON'T-" But he dropped her in and she gasped. She popped up out of the water and pushed him hard in the chest. " FUCK YOU ASSHOLE! I JUST SHOWERED!" He splashed her to shut her up and instead she jumped on him knocking him back over. He glared at her.

" RUDE!" He yelled picking her up again and walking back to shore. She growled as he headed up the car and put her down. The two got in and they drove back home, every now and then she'd glance over to him, in a daze of how beautiful he looked with the water reflecting the sun off his skin. The bruises were starting to heal, and even with the little scars, she noticed her old james come back.

Xxx

Nikki headed to rehersals the next day, she missed it too much to be away like that again. She missed her marilyn time, it was something she was always confident in. She finished her final number and smiled to her director derek. He clapped a couple times and crossed his arms again.

" Good to know you didn't loose your touch this past week." he said in his heavy british accent.

" Well thank you ." She commended.

" Can I see you for a moment." He said gesturing her to come down to him. She looked around nervously at the rest of her cast and they all shrugged. She walked up to him and the two walked out the red double doors to the hallway. " Lets take a walk shall we?" She nodded.

" Did I do something wrong?" she asked after 5 minutes of silence. He laughed.

" Actually quite the contrary. I was talking to my friend in cardiff, Hes a big producer in england. He explained he's doing a this movie over there that is going to be huge. He needs a girl for the part." He stopped and turned to her. " I dropped your name in there and he is highly interested." She eyed him and her mouth gaped a bit.

" Me? He wants...he wants me?" Derek nodded with a small smile.

" Your co-star is matt smith, Not sure if you've heard of him-" She nodded quickly and he laughed. " you'd be playing marilyn there as well. There some other movies hes doing as well and he seems to have taken a likeness to your acting. I think this is going to open big doors for you Nicole. I hope you take the offer. They'd set you up with an appartment and everything. All you have to do is say yes." She was about to say the word when suddenly logan , james, carlos and kendall popped into her head. She frowned.

" How long do I have to make the decision." He half smiled at her.

"2 weeks." He nodded in response and then 2 headed back to the theater. She went straight to her dressing room ignoring the calls from her friends and started to get ready for the nights performance.

Xxxx

When she arrived home at around 12, all she could think about was that offer. But what if she took it? What would happen if she stayed and got together with James? What about logan? Would they be mad? Would they support her? With all these questions runing through her head , she didn't notice James sitting out by the pool with the guys and Camille and Lucy and Penny. Wait double take, penny? She was sitting abnormally close to james.

" NIKKI!" Logan said and waved her over. She nervously walked up to them.

" Just the girl we wanted to see!" James said scooting over. She shook her head.

" No I better get going-" She started.

" Bull shit sit down and roast marshmellows with us!" kendall said. She sighed and walked over to them. She reluctantly sat down as far from james as possible and he looked a bit hurt. But there was no way she was going to sit there when Penny was wrapped under his arm.

" so how was the play?" carlos asked handing her a marshmellow. She thanked him and shrugged.

" Same as always." She was of very few words, due to seeing penny. And cuddled up to james like that. She took a bite and nervously fiddled with her fingers.

" nothing eventful?" Logan probed. She shurgged.

" Nothing." She said. " Im gonna head to bed, Uhm. Thanks for the marshmellow ill see you guys tomorrow." She stood up and turned to see penny place a kiss on james lips and he blushed. She had felt heartbreak before. But something like this? It was worse. Her insides churned she wanted to just throw up all over. Her eyes burned with tears and her heart clenched in her chest. She quickly turned and ran to the elevator. He lied to her. He said it meant nothing. She through open her door and threw her stuff on the couch. She grabbed her hair and suddenly the tears came cascading down.

" You fucking asshole!" She screamed in the air. The churning continued to get stronger. She ran around her kitchen opening and shutting cubboards trying to find any form of her poison in the house. She cursed loudly when all the bottles she found were empty. She kicked her wall and then punched it a couple of times in anger. Her phone buzzed next to her.

James D (11:30pm): Nikki are you okay? You seemed out of it.

She hit ignore and continued to sob, Her arms wrapped around her knees. Trusting him was her first mistake. I mean sure they weren't dating but he showed interest in her. He did lie to her. Her phone buzzed again.

Jamieeboy (11:40pm): Nikki talk to me.

Logiebear (11:45pm): Nicole whats wrong? Open your door!

Kendizzle (11:50pm) : You know they're going to open it if you don't :P

Carlitoss (11:55pm): Okay so warning. They just stole a keycard :p So if your naked id get dressed.

She groaned and wiped at her face. Not even a second, she can't have one moment of peace? She walked over to the sink and washed her eyes, making sure they weren't as red from crying and walked over to her door. She opened it and the four of them stood there looking concerned.

" Are you sick?" Logan asked walking in and placing his hand on her forehead. She pushed it away.

" No. Im fine." She turned away quickly.

" I beg to differ, who robbed you?" Asked kendall picking up the pieces of the broken lamp and vase. She shrugged.

" No one, Im just clumbsy." she retorted as carlos examined the dents in her wall.

" Damn you must have a hard head or something, this looked damaged." carlos said eyeing her suspiciously. She twisted her mouth.

" I guess I do. Can you all leave now? I wanna sleep." She said tierdly.

" Why'd you run off so fast?" James asked crossing his arms. She shrugged.

" I don't know im tierd can you go?" She whined. The obliged and she shut the door hard after them. Rubbing her head she walked into her room and fell onto her bed starring at the ceiling. She wasn't going to let this ruin her. Not the way it did with logan. She vowed to that.


	16. Chapter 16

He was at it again. Same old thing, same old melody. He was now with Penny. And nikki was more uncomfortable then ever. Everywhere they'd go, she'd feel uncomfortable. Everyone was a couple and she was alone. And the worst part? James flaunted it. As if she had her chance and lost it. But she didn't want a chance...Did she ? Half of her screamed, fuck you for not jumping on that train asap the other half said let penny have him. Worst part, she couldn't even hate penny. Just like she couldn't hate camille. Penny and James were on every cover, every story. The hottest couple out. She sighed as she downed the last of her cereal. She tossed the dish in the sink. It had been one week since Derek asked her the question. She wanted to go. Needed to go. But going would mean leaving them here. And she didn't know if she was ready for that. She asked her Dance teacher about it, and her teacher said she'd always have a spot in that company no matter what she decided. She read over the script. It was perfect. It was her. It was a love story trashed by tragedy. Nikki grabbed her gym bag and headed down to the lobby. Of course the lobby is crowded with paparazzi.

" Excuse me Sir, Im looking for my room key. Smith, Matt." Someone said behind her. She turned on her heel and her jaw dropped. Suddenly matts eyes landed on her, and a smile grew. " AHHHH NICOLE!" He screamed rushing over to her and hugging her tightly. Slightly caught off guard she smiled awkwardly as the cameras flashed. He pulled away. " God your even more beautiful in person! How are you? I assume you've answerd the question yes?" her eyes widened as she spotted 4 familiar faces over his shoulder. She grabbed matts hand and ran out the double doors. Taken aback she pulled them into a small nook behind the Palmwoods.

" Okay so, I haven't really answered the question and NO one knows about it. So if you can just keep this between us-" he held up his hands with a smile.

" Between us. Got it. So who are we hiding from?" He asked curious

" Nikki...Is there any reason your hiding in a deserted ally with …." Logan trailed off 3 mildly shocked boys behind him. Nikki laughed nervously. Matt eyed her.

" Matt Smith, And uhm no we were just...uhm." But She was a loss for words.

" I was coming back to see her. I missed her dearly, Shes too beautiful to keep away from you know?" She shot him a shocked glance. He shrugged and smiled.

" So are you two like?...Dating?" James asked in a non believing tone. Matt smiled wildly. He caught on quick.

" Not yet. Hopefully soon though, if I can ever get her to say yes." all four of them dropped there mouths as penny walked up behind them. She suddenly screamed wildly in a fan girl notion and jumped up and down. James and the guys grabbed hold of there ears wincing.

" HOLY SHIT! BLOODY FUCKING HELL! YOUR MATT FUCKING SMITH ! I LOVE YOU ! IVE SEEN ALL OF YOUR DOCTOR WHO SEASONS-I HAVE ALL YOUR POSTERS OH MY GOD I CAN NOT BELIEVE THIS IS HAPPENING!" She said running up to him and pulling out her iphone snapping a quick picture. She squeeled some more and jumped up and down next to james.

" DO YOU KNOW WHO THAT FUCKING IS?" She screamed slapping him playfully. He whined and starred at her scared.

" Matt smith?" He answered cautiously.

" FUCKING YES! What are you doing here?" She said excitedly. He wrapped his arm around nikkis waist and pulled her close.

" Im here to...See my lovely nikki. I met her in NY when I was filming the Doctor Who series and we just connected. Ive yet to get her to say yes to going to a date with me." he said with a wink. Pennys mouth dropped as well.

" YOU HAVEN'T SAID YES TO HIM? Nicole im disappoined in you. Where is your spirit go out with him! Hes gorgeous." She cooed. James glared at matt and then to penny. He was most deffinatly the jealous type.

Xxx

Matt and nikki sat outisde a small cafe on the boulavard. She clued him in on everything and he sat and listend.

" Bloody hell. Your perfect for this part! Why haven't you said yes yet?" He argued to her.

" because I love him." She froze did she just say those words. Did she just say those words...about james? And so casually. Matt smiled wickedly.

" I knew it. Love is a great disadvantage is it not?" He sipped his green tea and she groaned.

" It depends on how everything plays out."

" Play out? Hes with that loud girl ehm... Whats her name?"

" Penny-"

" PENNY! Right so hes with her. Whats the question of it? Just say yes."

" But 6 months? In a place I have no friends no family-"

" Excuse me miss you have me! And didn't have anyone here before you met up with them did you? And New York?"

" Those are states not countries!" He sighed.

" I can only give you the benefits Nicole. I can't make you go. Thats your choice. Just remember what you have to live with both ways." He said standing up. " I've got to go. I have a couple interviews while im here for the next couple of days." He kissed her on the cheek. " Please re-think this." He said walking away to his car. She sighed. Re think it? She barely wanted it in her mind at all. She headed back to the palm woods, reluctantly going over everything in her mind.

She walked into the lobby and into the elevator. When she got to her floor she walked around the cornor to her appartment. Suddenly she heard voices down her hall and hid behind the wall. It sounded like james and penny. Spying was never a good thing, but it was truth breaker.

Thats when she heard it. Something that could crush someones no matter how strong of a rib cage you had. A boulder to the chest and the take down of your walls.

" james, I think I love you." She heard pennys voice whisper.

" I love you to penny." James words cut her so hard, she lost her balance and grabbed on the wall for support. The shock overrided her. She wasn't going to have a meltdown. Not again. She picked herself, her heart internally bleeding through out as she walked stone like passed them. James and penny smiled to her warmly and she merrily nodded and through open her door and slammed it shut. She picked her phone up and hit recents.

" Matt. Ill be ready by friday." She said hitting end before he had a chance to share his excitement. She called derek and told him as well as her dance instructer. She sat on her bed and looked around. She spotted her guitar, the one she had baught and never really played. Her anger, and hurt seethed through her. She had nothing to take it out on. Cautiously she picked it up and placed it around her back. She grabbed her bag and camera. She ran out of her appartment , passing james and penny who called after her.

" NIKKI!" james screamed running after her. She stopped and turned on her heel. Logan, kendall and carlos had made there way out of 2j by this point and she merrily looked away as she quickly jumped on the elevator. She hit door close and arrived at the lobby. She booked it to the car park and tossed her stuff in the back of her crappy rental car she barely drove. She could see everyone standing in the lobby looking for her. She hit the gas and drove down the highway. Tears covered her cheeks, her makeup was probably the worst it had ever been. Her phone had 25 texts and 18 missed calls-22 missed calls. She spotted roque records and swirved into the parking lot. She walked up to the desk and suddenly spotted kelly and waved to her.

" NIKKI! Nice to see you hun, did you need something?" Kelly said hugging her, concerned with how distraught she looked.

" Yeah, I was wondering if I coud borrow one of your studios to record something?" kelly eyed her curiously.

" Of course, take studio d. Gustavo never uses that one." She handed nikki and smiled.

" Thank you – OH and if the guys ask. Im not here nor was I ever." she said running to the elevator. Kelly nodded and smiled.

" Got it!" She yelled after her. Nikki arrived at the 3rd floor and walked up to studio d. She set up her camera and walked into the booth. She hit record and sighed.

"I've never done this before. Uhm... talking to a camera is kinda weird but I know everyones going to watch this when I leave so. I guess I should start explaining." She started sniffling. " Sorry this is going to be harder then I thought. I've never really played guitar, I only ever learned one song. Anyway, ive been pushed around a lot, kicked and torn down. My walls have officially reached there breaking point." She let out a sob and wipped her eyes on her sleave. " They say you should never run from your problems, but that has seems to work for me so far. So while your watching this, ill be either on a flight or already in Cardiff. I got offered a movie deal. I get to play marilyn monroe in a love tragedy kind of story." She laughed a bit through her tears. " Basically what my life is right now. Truth be told, im not sure how to say it twice..." She inhaled and closed her eyes. " James..." She sobbed. " I love you? Yeah actually I do. A lot, and uhm" she laughed a bit again. " I thought I could stop and move on, but its you. And it sucks because no one is ever going to be loved by me like I love you . Even logan, who I lost it to will never measure up to you. And its... going to kill me. You...you are going to kill me. And I can't sit and wait anymore james, I.. I can't watch you...be with all these girls. Not again. I barely made it through junior high because of you. Asking me to do it again? Its going to ruin me. So I have to go. I have to... Start over. And you will probably never feel the way I do about you, but when im around you, I love you in the stupidest way, when you laugh and when your vulnerable. Those poems on the computer I...I give up. IM sorry this has to be our good bye but, any other would make me stay here and I just can't do that. So this is for you james." She finally calmed down enough to play.

"_Last night I heard my own heart beating_

_Sounded like footsteps on my stairs_

_Six months gone and I'm still reaching_

_Even though I know you're not there_

_I was playing back a thousand memories, baby_

_Thinkin' 'bout everythin' we've been through_

_Maybe I've been goin' back too much lately_

_When time stood still and I had you_

_Come back, come back, come back to me like_

_You would, you would if this was a movie_

_Stand in the rain outside_

_'Til I came out_

_Come back, come back, come back to me like_

_You could, you could if you just said you're sorry_

_I know that we could work it out somehow_

_But if this was a movie you'd be here by now_

_I know people change and these things happen_

_But I remember how it was back then_

_Locked up in your arms and our friends were laughing_

_'Cause nothing like this ever happened to them_

_Now, I'm pacing down the hall, chasing down your street_

_Flashback to the night when you said to me_

_"Nothing's gonna change, not for me and you "_

_Not before I knew how much I had to lose_

_Come back, come back, come back to me like_

_You would, you would if this was a movie_

_Stand in the rain outside_

_'Til I came out_

_Come back, come back, come back to me like_

_You could, you could if you just said you're sorry_

_I know that we could work it out somehow_

_But if this was a movie you'd be here by now_

_If you're out there, if you're somewhere, if you're moving on_

_I've be waiting for you ever since you've been gone_

_I just want it back the way it was before_

_And I just wanna see you back at my front door_

_And I say come back, come back, come back to me like_

_You would before you said it's not that easy_

_Before the fight, before I locked you out_

_But I'd take it all back now_

_Come back, come back, come back to me like_

_You would, you would if this was a movie_

_Stand in the rain outside_

_'Til I came out_

_Come back, come back, come back to me like_

_You could, you could if you just said sorry_

_I know that we could work it out somehow_

_But if this was a movie you'd be here by now_

_You'd be here by now_

_It's not the kind of ending you wanna see now_

_Baby, what about the ending?_

_Oh, I thought you'd be here by now_

_That you'd be here by now" _She finished and gripped the mic. She walked over to the camera and hit end. She loaded it onto a dvd and packed her stuff away. She exited rock records and slid back into her car. It hit her again as she gripped the stearing wheel. She headed back to the palm woods. When she walked in, the lobby was empty and she quickly made her way back to her appartment. She advised matt to still not tell anyone because of she wanted to present it to the boys. Todays events played in her mind like an unfinished movie. But if this was a movie, she'd win. Not penny.

Xxx

Nikki glanced around at her empty bedroom. It was 2am and she had a flight to catch in an hour. She packed the last of her bags and headed down the stairs. She snuck past 2j, although she knew the boys were at there concert. She taped the dvd she had made on there door, kissing it and tossing her bag over her shoulder. Things changed. Everything changed. She handed bitters her keycard and smiled to him.

" Pleasure staying here." She said smiling to him. He nodded.

" Pleasure having you Ms. Sivini." She walked out solomny, not looking back was best. She hit play on her ipod and her car headed to LAX.


	17. Chapter 17

Carlos, logan , kendall james and the girls all headed upstairs to 2j where they were loudly singing call me maybe jokingly. They finally reached the door and laughed as logan tried to get it open.

" Hey carlos go tell nikki were back!" Kendall said pushing carlos toward her room. He smiled lightly and walked over, pulling out the spare key card they had taken. He slipped it in and threw open the door.

" NIKKI! WE'RE HOME! YOU MISSED ONE HELL OF A-" But he stopped and glanced around. His voice echoed through the rooms. Something he wasn't used to. He ran in examining everthing. His heart dropped into his stomach. He ran out of her room and back to 2j where everyone stood in shock holding a dvd , that had been taped up. " guys. She's gone...all her stuff...whats that?" he asked fearfully. They walked inside and logan put the dvd in. Everyone sat down as it began playing.

"I've never done this before. Uhm... talking to a camera is kinda weird but I know everyones going to watch this when I leave so. I guess I should start explaining." She started sniffling.

" Thats how she looked at the hospital the day you got hurt..." Kendall said sadly.

" Sorry this is going to be harder then I thought. I've never really played guitar, I only ever learned one song. Anyway, ive been pushed around a lot, kicked and torn down. My walls have officially reached there breaking point." She let out a sob and wipped her eyes on her sleave. " They say you should never run from your problems, but that has seems to work for me so far. So while your watching this, ill be either on a flight or already in Cardiff. I got offered a movie deal. I get to play marilyn monroe in a love tragedy kind of story." She laughed a bit through her tears.

" Shes in England?" Logan questioned tears falling down his cheeks. Camille rubbed his back soothingly.

" Why would she leave like th-that?" Carlos let out a sob.

" Basically what my life is right now. Truth be told, im not sure how to say it twice..." She inhaled and closed her eyes. " James..."

James perked up at his name. She was so broken. Tears started to fall from james eyes as he moved closer to the screen. How could he have let this happen? Of all people?

" I love you? Yeah actually I do. A lot, and uhm" she laughed a bit again. " I thought I could stop and move on, but its you. And it sucks because no one is ever going to be loved by me like I love you . Even logan, who I lost it to will never measure up to you. And its... going to kill me. You...you are going to kill me. And I can't sit and wait anymore james, I.. I can't watch you...be with all these girls. Not again. I barely made it through junior high because of you. Asking me to do it again? Its going to ruin me."

James let out a sob and smiled.

" she loves me... She actually loves me." He said his voice cracking horribly. He felt kendall clap him on the back and give im a reassuring squeeze. " What have I done..."

"So I have to go. I have to... Start over. And you will probably never feel the way I do about you, but when im around you, I love you in the stupidest way, when you laugh and when your vulnerable. Those poems on the computer I...I give up. IM sorry this has to be our good bye but, any other would make me stay here and I just can't do that. So this is for you james." She finally calmed down.

Everyone watched her pick up the guitar and start to play If this was a movie by taylor swift. The emotion that tore her down, started to break all of them down as well. James lost it by her ' I love you' Speech. She's right he did ruin her. He tore her down and then kick her remains. How could he be so stupid. He looked to penny , who happened to also be in tears wiping them away furiously. She walked up to james and kissed him on the cheek.

" James. She needs you. She loves you. She always has and always will. And she's right," Penny inahled. " No one is ever going to love you like she does." With that penny walked out of the room and james turned back to the tv that was paused on the most painful part. He turned to everyone.

" Wh-What... do I d-do?" he asked unable to control his emotions anymore. " S-shes gone."

" Go after her." Logan said placing his hands on his best friends shoulders.

" I don't know if I can..." He said broken, looking down in shame.


	18. Chapter 18

**2 months later**

" AND CUT! PERFECT! THATS A WRAP FOR TODAY!" yelled derek as he walked over to nikki and hugged her. " Amazing job today," she smiled warmly.

" thank you," She said.

" Im glad you convinced me to come back and co-direct. I don't think I could've stuck with theater marilyn much longer. Now go home and rest." He said kissing her forehead as she nodded and walked over to her dressing station. Matt walked up behind her and hugged her from the waist. She jumped and turned around to see him smiling at her slyly.

" You were beautiful today Ms. Monroe." he said pushing her hair out of her face. She smirked.

" You we're so bad yourself." she said playfully pushing him away. He winked and leaned next to her crossing his arms.

" Hey your coming to the pub later with me and dani yes?" He said nudging her. She looked down and packed her stuff away.

" I...i don't think I am. Im just gonna go home and watch the tele."

" tele aye? Seems UK got to you fast. Thats all right, she's gonna miss her best friend though."

" Shouldn't you be your own girlfriends best friend? Why do I have to always tag along?" She said crossing her arms. He shrugged.

" She can't keep haning with the guys," He said matter of factly. " Anyways, I wish you were coming. You can't keep yourself locked up all the time."

" Yes I can."

" Stop being so childlish Nicole. They're popular here now. Get over it." he said placing a kiss on her cheek. " Learn to live with what is inevitable." He said walking away. He was right, she knew it. Suddenly the first month after coming her, Big time rush became the biggest sensation. She pulled off her wig and placed it on the manaquinn head. She then quickly undressed and pulled on her skinny jeans and coat. One bad thing about UK? The weather. She quickly threw he bag over her shoulder and walked out to the car park. She glanced around the empty lot and spotted her mini cooper and started to walk toward it as rain began pound against her. She cussed as her now chin length hair started to curl.

Suddenly she saw man standing ahead by her car. She stopped and did a double take and saw a familiar head of brunette hair and set of green eyes. She covered her mouth.

" James..." was all she could whisper before she picked up the pace and he stood up smiling. She starred at him in disbelief. AS if her mind was playing tricks on her again.  
"It took me one month of logan and his nagging and another month to realize how fucking stupid I was to not get on a plane then and there and chase you back home." He said confidently. She reached out to touch him but pulled back. " You look beautiful. I love your hair. You cut it. It suites you." She covered her mouth and shook her head. Suddenly her hand collided with his cheek and he stumbled back shocked.

" You prick." She said before she dropped her stuff. She began punching him in his chest cursing left and right. He grabbed her hands.

" I deserved that." His hands cupped her face. He pressed his lips to hers hard making her knees weaken. She wrapped her arms around his neck and he pulled her as close as he could. " that is way to overdue." He said leaning his forehead against hers.

" You bastard. If this is going to happen. You better promise me right now, right here no more funny business. No sneaking around no cheating on me nothing do you understand?" She said breathless. He nodded a couple tears escaping his eyes.

" Never. Your mine do you understand that? Forever. Your stuck with me." He said pressing his lips to hers again. He pulled her car door open and they immediately jumped in. She presses her foot to the gas and they drive off to her appartment. When they arrive, james lifts her up by her ass cheeks and kicks in her door, his lips traveling up and down her neck. Both of them are soaked from the pouring rain, they quickly undress, not even waiting for the bedroom. He lifts her up once more and he walks to the bedroom with her throwing her on the bed. He falls ontop of her, Kissing up and down her breasts and midtrail. She moans as he bites into her neck. He slowly begins to push into her making her gasp and dig her nails into his back. He pulls out and smirks.

" Oh god james its been months don't fucking tease me!" She yells and he thrusts back into her. Her back archs into him and he grips his hands on her hip bones, building up rhythem.

" You have no idea, how long ive waited for this." He whispers eviliy in her ear. She moans and runs her hands through his hair making him speed up. She suddenly flips them over and starts to bounce up and down on him making him moan and shift in response. Her teeth graze behind his ear and he calls out her name.

" You gonna cum for me baby?" she whispers into his ear softly placing her lips on his jugular vien. He inahles sharply and closes his eyes tightly.

" Fuck nikki. Fuckkk." He lets out. She can feel him tense and release inside her. She breathes in deeply, falling ontop of him in a sweaty mess. He pulls her close and places a kiss on her head.

" Hey nikki?"

" Yes james?" she says, her eyes closed and cuddled into his embrace.

" I love you." She sits up and smiles a tear escaping her eye.

"really?" He nodd with a smile placing a kiss on her lips.

" I love you too." she says before drifting to sleep in his arms.

Xxx

" excuse me, But who said you can get dressed?" James said wrapping his arms around nikkis waist placing kisses up and down her neck. She smirked and rolled her eyes.

" Adults have work today James. Speaking of, im sure gustavo has shit bricks wondering where you are." she said handing him a pancake. He smiled and ate it with a smile.

" Nah, we're here for a couple months. Plus logan and kendall do most of the interviews anyways. I mean I have one later today, You gonna come with me?" He said rocking her back and forth.

" Ill see what time filming gets done." she says as she jokingly wipes her batter coverd hand on his face.

" Oh see now, you should not have done that."

" NO JAMES! I HAVE FILMING DON'T-" But he pressed lips on hers . She giggled and pushed him away. " Oh you asshole, I was going to be early for once." He smirked and let her go. She walked into the bathroom and cleaned her face. She walked back into the kitchen and wiped james down. He pressed his nose into her neck and she rolled her eyes.

" Don't leave...i don't wanna go back to the hotel." he whined cuddling into her. She sighed and ran her hand through his hair.

" Sorry babe, I don't make the schedual. Wait are you sure thats the only reason you haven't been back there for a week? Or is it because you have yet to tell them where you've been?" She placed her hands on her hips and he lifted his head shamefully.

" the second part."

" James-"

" I don't know how to tell them!" He yelled in protest. She sighed and threw the towel down.

" Figure out a way or I will." She said grabbing her bag and walking up to him. " clean before you leave Oh and put some pants on. Please? Godforbid someone walks in here." she said kissing him lightly and turning on her heel. Suddenly she felt james hand collide with her ass and she jumped.

" Oh sorry, You were teasing me." he said with a smirk. She walked over to him and got extremely close. Her nails grazed up and down his bare back making him shiver.

" Ill punish you for that later." She said with a wink and ran out the door. He sighed and looked around. They had been together a week and basically did nothing but have sex cuddle and just be in each others presence. He didn' tell gustavo or the guys where he was and only told him he was okay and would be back today for the interview. He also had to tell them about him and nikki. He rubbed the back of his neck and started to clean the mess they had made.

Xxx

James slipped his keycard into the lock as it lit up green. He pushed open the door to reveal 3 very pissed off boys. Logan stood up and glared him down.

" James where the hell have you been?" He screamed. James just smiled and shook his head.

" I uhm...i found her." James said rubbing the back of his neck and droping his overnight bag on his bed.

" Found who?" carlos questioned crossing his arms.

"Nikki." Was all he replied before all the boys eyes widened in shock.

" You mean..." Kendall started and james smiled wider nodding excitedly.

" Yeah." He was at a loss for words. Even when she wasn't here she managed to make him speechless.

" I think the next couple of months im gonna stay with her at her appartment-If thats okay?" He added quickly.

" Well yeah dude. We don't mind. Just remember interviews and concerts and you should be fine." Kendall said with a smile. " So how is she?"

" Beautiful as ever. She cut her hair, its up to her chin now. And its curly, it looks amazing." He said relaxing onto his bed starring at the ceiling.

" So what are you gonna say if the interviewer asks about your love life?" Logan asked fixing his jacket in the mirror.

" That im taken." James said assuredly.

Xxxx

Nikki drove down the road toward her appartment. She kenw james was coming back tonight so she wanted to get home quick. Suddenly her phone buzzed telling her to put on bbc4 radio. She turned it up and heard james and the boys talking about there concerts in Europe. She smiled to herself as they answered fans questions and laughed.

" So I gotta ask boys, Your all so attractive-" the DJ started.

" Oh well thank you not so bad yourself-" Kendall joked back.

" Well thank you, So girlfriends. Are you all taken? Cause last time I checked james was the only single soul." Nikkis breath caught in her throat.

" Yeah well that acutally changed about a week ago. I met up with this girl i've been friends with for awhile actually. We had chased each other awhile-"

" More like months!" logan added with a laugh.

" But everything turned out for the good, she's actually filming here in Cardiff so..."

" Oh really? She's british?" The DJ asked in curiousity.

" NO! No," He laughed. " Shes american, but uhm she's playin Marilyn Monroe in the that new film with matt smith -"

" You mean your dating Nicole Sivini?" The interviewer asked in shock with a laugh.

" Yeah, actually. Best choice i've ever made in my life really." He laughed. Nikki blushed as she pulled over, to distracted to drive.

" Shes beautiful mate, You must've been damn good friends yeah?" The other dj said as they all laughed.

" Yeah im still in shock too." James laughed.

"Gotta ask, Hows the sex?" They all laughed. She knew james well enough to know he was was turning red. "oh must be good england he's turning red as hell!"

" Uh, she's gonna kill me but its pretty fucking amazing if I have to describe it. I guess its because when you do it with the wrong person, you can like tell your relationship is going to be shitty from the start, but with her its like...Wow."

" Speechless?" Kendall laughed into the mic.

" Yeah pretty much!" James laughed lightly. " But, yeah she's probably the biggest highlight in my life right now aside from tour. Shes deffinatly a keeper for hopefully a really long time."

" Thats great to hear man, And let me just say you guys get married, your kids are going to hit the genetic lotto because, she is... wooh!" Nikki blushed again, laughing a bit to herself. " Do you guys want kids when you get older?"

" Yeah I mean, I would have them now if I wasn't so young," James laughed. Nikki texted him. " And nikki must be listening because she just texted me telling me that we can practice tonight... Oh my god NICOLE! I hope your boss is listening!" he laughed loudly.

Nikki blushed and headed home. Her mind wondered, what if they did get married? What if they did have kids? Did she want to spend her life with james? Shaking those thoughts from her mind, she walked into her appartment. Smiling she noticed james had cleaned everything up for her. There was a note on the table and she picked it up.

' Hey baby girl, I love you . Ill see you tonight ;) xox JM' She read it then folded up putting it in her wallet. She maybe young, but she knew what love meant. Being with a person who wants you flaws and all. James was her person. James was her everything.

_HELLO MY BEAUTIFUL READERS! Ive decided to end It here BUT FEAR NOT. I WILL HAVE A SEQUAL UP THIS WEEK! YUP :) U DIDNT THINK ID LEAVE IT LIKE THIS DID YOU? OH HELL NO! The sequal is going to be called ' As long as you love me' :3 So ADD IT! :3 Love you guys :3_


End file.
